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Should I get in touch with enemies after 15 years? - Printable Version

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Should I get in touch with enemies after 15 years? - MannyK - 03-24-2014 04:18 PM

15 years ago I was attacked and involved in a horrific altercation with a young man which left him permanently damaged.

Yesterday, 15 years on, his sister has found me and tried to connect with me on a social media site. Should I respond and see what she has to say, or should I ignore it?

I think his family may still be angry, even though I was acting in self-defence. Is it a positive attempt to reach out to me, or the beginning of a revenge plan?


- Kathy - 03-24-2014 04:24 PM

I think I would let bygones be bygones.


- Common Sense - 03-24-2014 04:33 PM

I am pretty intuitive and I am not getting a good feeling about this.

I would not involve myself with her or her family or him ever again. I just do not see anything good coming out of a situation where you were basically forced to cause bodily harm, resulting in permanent damage while you had to protect yourself. Yikes!!


- James - 03-24-2014 04:40 PM

I would ignore it. That you fear a revenge plot means you do not trust her motivations, so why risk walking into a snake pit? Once you "friend" (or whatever) her, she can find out so much about you. It's a pity if she simply wants to share a positive message (there's really no way of knowing), but I wouldn't take my chances.


- Schuyler - 03-24-2014 04:45 PM

The LEAST you can do is respond! And deeply and sincerely apologize. I could not live knowing I had had any part of permanently damaging someone no matter what the reason.


- Seven - 03-24-2014 04:46 PM

No. Ignore the request and walk away. Nothing good can come from it and you could be harmed.

What are the chances that this person who violently attacked you for no reason has a peace loving family?


- Andrew - 03-24-2014 04:52 PM

No, let bygones be bygones. Things have gone well between that time and now, no words exchanged, no tension, no comebacks, so just let it go. Don't answer the facebook or whatever page. In fact, block them. If they haven't needed you during the 15 years of silence, they certainly don't need you now.