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+--- Thread: my brother abuses my mother, what should i do? (/thread-147448.html)
my brother abuses my mother, what should i do? - Yuna - 04-28-2014 04:38 AM
Im 21 married with a child and my brother is 23 and still lives with my mom and almost every 2weeks she calls saying that she had to call the police on him. No he has his gf livin at MY moms house and theres nothing i can do about it. Me and my husband have told her over and over to not let him come back but keeps movin him bk in. He acts like this bcuz our dad was VERY abusive. But..... i have my own life now and i cant just drive over there and defend her. What should i do. Im sick of tellin her to kick him out.
- Iratetray710 - 04-28-2014 04:43 AM
go in and check that ninja man, give him an old fashion A$$ whoopin
- swamp-fox - 04-28-2014 04:45 AM
Tell her to stop complaining about his behavior if she keeps letting him in and won't kick him out. The only person who can truly stop this situation is her. She needs to be the one to stand up and be firm that he can't act this way and still live with her.
- ? - 04-28-2014 04:50 AM
Your mum sound's like a loving mother no matter how much he put ur mum down she always finds a place in her heart to take him back could you or your husband not take him to one side and talk to him say things like you have to start and show mum some respect cause she isn't always going to be here and when she isn't here you will regret how you treated her say things to him that will hit home
- Vonheilm - 04-28-2014 04:51 AM
Call a womens' crisis center in your area, if you have one. They can offer her a safe place to go when he abuses her, or better yet, before he abuses her again. They can help her to get a restraining order and possibly find somewhere to move without him finding out or having access.
- con the fruiterer - 04-28-2014 05:01 AM
Involve the police.
Gather evidence. Install cameras. Confront him him with his behaviour. Get other family involved. Name and shame him. Social media is a good way to expose him.
- geewhiz - 04-28-2014 05:04 AM
Have your mom tell him that he has two weeks to move himself and the girl out of the house. Then on that day, - Help Mom get the locks changed while he's out, (Because I doubt he will believe her), help her get all of their stuff out in the yard if need be. Call the local cops and explain things.Alert them as he could get mean. Put a note on the door, assuming he can read, say he has been evicted and will not be welcome here any more. It's like a reverse intervention! Don't answer the door don't say anything to him, like no one is home. If he starts making a scene, get those cops over there. They'll be glad she finally tossed him out. DO NOT LET HIM BACK IN! My 23 year old ended up in a tent during a very cold spell because of his attitude. I believe it was the best thing for him. He appreciates things now, like food and electricity. That he pays for at HIS apt. It was hard but your mom HAS to make him stand on his own two feet. Bonus, his girl won't like it and probably leave him. It's called growing UP. Then OUT!
- Barbara - 04-28-2014 05:11 AM
You can report it to social services, but I believe she may have to be elderly for elder abuse. You can call the police and have him arrested if know when it is happening. This might cause more issues for your mother. The big thing is until she wants the help there is not much you can do except move her in with you, and she still has to agree with that.
- Grace - 04-28-2014 05:21 AM
Tell you mom to move to your place and sell the house, I mean I highly doubt he''ll go to your house and bring his girlfriend. I mean if your mom moves to your place she can help with your child when you go to work. It's clear knowledge to me, that one should not abuse the person that raised you. It's just disrespectful