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IS IT WRONG TO MISS A DEAD FAMILY MEMBER YOU'VE NEVER MET? - Printable Version

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IS IT WRONG TO MISS A DEAD FAMILY MEMBER YOU'VE NEVER MET? - Alert Wolf - 11-09-2012 10:15 AM

my mom started lecturing me about how i joined a SIDS "support" group on facebook "with a bunch of strangers who could really be murderers" (according to my mom) my cousin died of sids when he was 7 weeks old 20 (almost 21) years ago and i'm only 16 so i never met him but i miss him and aparently i'm "taking on the greif of my aunt, uncle, and cousin" (again, according to my mom) my mom just doesn't understand; my old karate dojo was practically next door to where he died AND we live in the town of the hospital he was pronounced dead at (i've probably passed that hospital a million times since i've been here) AND i'm super close (to where we're twins) with his sister
she just doesn't understand, am i wrong to miss him?
btw its not really a support group, i mean, it kinda is but not legitimately she just keeps calling it that


- Hondaman - 11-09-2012 10:24 AM

Yes, of course it is, you ponce.


- hai - 11-09-2012 10:24 AM

Do you miss an impounded BMW that you never knew of? Do you miss the 1700s? No, not normal.


- Jez - 11-09-2012 10:24 AM

You're kind of a drama llama, huh?

Leave the grief to the people who actually lost the child. No one needs you acting like a weirdo.

I live in a town where people have died, too, but I don't feel like it personally impacts me.


- lisa - 11-09-2012 10:24 AM

It is never wrong to grieve. It sounds like you are a very compasionate person. You feel bad for your Aunt and Uncle and their family. You could be reaching out to that support group for answers about loss and a death of a child. You are still young and learning. However, as a Mother, I can see your Mom's concern about being on the internet. Sounds like she cares for you and wants to keep her "baby" safe. Ask her to sit and talk with you, she just might have the answers you are looking for. I bet if you talked with your Aunt she would answer your questions too.


- Punkgirl101 - 11-09-2012 10:24 AM

Absolutly not. I miss my grandmother everyday, and i never met her in my life. My mom has told me so much things about her when she was alive. I have pictures of her saved on my phone, hanging on my wall etc. She died 17 years ago, at the age of 40 because of a heart attack. I write her letters for her birthday and paint pictures to put by her grave. Dont worry about how you feel about your cousins death. If thats the way you feel, so be it.

Hope I helped!