Writers: If you were published...(Random writerly questions)?

[Steven J Pemberton]

1) I probably wouldn't offer, but if the publisher asked, I might read some of them and offer a quote to any manuscript I thought deserved one.

2) I might do an occasional post of advice for writers, but wouldn't have a blog exclusively for that purpose.

3) Twitter - probably not. Blog - maybe. Facebook - if it's a fan page, wouldn't that mean it was made by fans, so I shouldn't have any influence over it?

4) To begin with, but I'd probably give it up after a while. The temptation to argue with reviewers would become too great after a while, and no good ever comes of it.

5) Not unless my publicist told me to, and convinced me that the controversy would generate enough sales to make up for the ill will I'd generate among the other authors' fans. I'm so cynical sometimes...

6) Sure.

7) Sure, if the publisher paid for it.

8) Yes.

9) As long as they paid the return postage.

10) As long as it was somewhere I'd care to go on holiday, and as long as the publisher paid for it.

11) Not if I had to pay for them. Fans would come to expect them, and I probably wouldn't be able to afford a lot of them.

12) Not to everyone who wanted one - only to people who'd helped me before I got published.

13) Maybe, if I was busy enough to justify one, or if I could afford one.

14) Maybe, if I thought he would bring in a lot more money than he cost.

15) I don't know about "regularly", but I'd try to do it.

16) Yes.

17) God no. Actually, maybe I'd do it for charity. If the fan insisted on naming the character after himself, I'd make something ridiculous and/or humiliating happen to him.

18) No. Readers can almost always tell when a review has been written by someone who is... let's say "predisposed to favour the author."

19) Possibly, but I'd much rather quote from professional reviewers. The trouble with quoting fans is that nobody knows who they are, and so people who don't know them will probably assume that the "fans" are actually your mum or your best friend.

20) Probably not.

21) If there were only a few of them. If there were lots (I can dream, can't I?) I would either have to list all of them (which would confuse new fans who wouldn't know which were the good ones) or pick the ones I thought were best, and risk pissing off the fans who I didn't think had good sites.

22) Probably not.

23) *Read* all of it? Sure. *Answer* all of it? Highly unlikely.

24) The post office will usually refuse to carry anything edible or perishable... Where I live at the moment is very short on space, so if I received more than a few "gifts" I'd have to ask fans not to send them.

25) If it was somewhere I could get to without having to stay overnight, I'd consider it. I'd probably just ask for my expenses.

(Sorry for cutting out the questions, but Y!A seemed to think my answer was too long otherwise. Me? Long-winded? Whatever gave you that idea?)