How to let go of someone you love?

[Tom]

Hey man, that's not odd at all.

My girlfriend of two and a half years left me nearly three weeks ago. You go through so many phases of thought after the break-up. All kinds of thoughts like what did you do wrong, what could you have done better, is there any kind of chance you'll get back together, did she meet someone else.. all depends on how your relationship was I guess and how you felt about her.

Those sayings you detest, they're all true. They don't help you out or make the situation easier, but they're still true. The first thing I did when my ex left me was break off all contact, I'd say at least 3-4 weeks. I deleted all my texts, facebook, emails, pictures, got rid of anything I had that reminded me of her. Memory triggers, you know? Thinking about her is only going to make things worse.

Secondly, I realised that there was a reason we broke up. Whether it was me or her is irrelevant really, what's relevant is that one person in the relationship didn't want to be in it. And no relationship should or could ever work like that. You'll find one of the worst things is all you can remember or think about is the good times, the happy memories. I guess like I said it depends entirely on your break-up, how your relationship was and how much you loved her, but you need to get rid of all the happy memories and think about anything bad, negative. For now.

The more you think about the good times, the more you're going to want to be with her, the harder you make it for yourself. Whether you break up with her or she ditches you, there's reasons. Usually more than one. Were there any specific problems in your relationship?

Your mum was right, what you need to do is take your mind off it, surround yourself with your friends and family, people who love you. Imagine your heart as two pieces, two circles. One of those circles is you and your heart, the other on the other side was your ex's. That one just broke off and broke away, and now there's a massive hole in the side of your own circle, your heart. You need to fill it. If you like gaming on your PS3, now's the time. If you have any other hobbies like football, music, preferrably something more practical, now's the time.

Exercise is a great way to get rid of depression, keep your body and your mind focused and busy. It also exhausts you so that you get plenty of sleep at night, so you don't need to lie awake thinking about it. It means you also feel better in the morning than you usually would.

There's alot of things you can do to help you man but at the end of the day you need to be your own best friend at this time. DO NOT get yourself down. Was it because of my looks? Was I too boring? Was I too clingy? Questions like that are pointless, at least for now.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBoZiIS3e...re=related

This video helped me a little, guy gives some good advice and tells it like it is. You need someone to talk to, hit me up. taintedaura@live.co.uk