Does anyone have solutions to these relationship issues? (especially tips from guys!)?

[Shy Guy]

Twitter Problem: Next you are on a date, ask him what he's doing. When he says he is checking his Twitter, tell him he seems distracted and you'll give him privacy to check his account. Then get up and leave and go home. Yes, I'm serious. Walk out at that moment and take a bus or cab home if necessary.

Food Problem: Make a list of what he eats when he stops by. Go to the grocery store together and tell him that when you invite him over for dinner, you are paying for the food. But when he treats your kitchen like an "All you can eat" restaurant, he is going to buy these items on your list.

Mean Comments Problem: Anytime he makes a bad comment, stop and look him right in the eye. Say "When you say something like that, do you think it makes me like you more?" Then give 10 seconds of pure silence and then go back to whatever you were doing. (He is now on notice that one more comment might get him dumped).

Other:

Make a rule that he MUST call before coming to your apartment. Women don't like surprise guests, not even boyfriends (maybe once a month).

Cut down to 2 dates per week and NO communication between dates. See if his attraction to you improves when you have some time apart.