I just feel like opening up to someone anonymous...?

[Stella]

It's never too late to improve a sucky situation. You sound pretty intelligent/mature especially for being able to admit your problems and express how you feel about them. I think the main source of your issues comes from your anxiety and it's impossible to fix anything else while you still suffer these attacks. The best way to go about this would be counseling/therapy since it's really difficult to fix on your own and home-schooling only helps you to avoid the problems, not face them. Most schools can offer you free counseling if you want to consider going back to high school but if not, check with your insurance company or talk to your parents about it. In cases like these, most insurance companies would cover at least some kind of therapy. It was brave of you to go against your friends and not smoke weed so congrats on staying true to yourself in this case
Before anything else focus on improving your anxiety enough so that you can consider going back to school because your depression probably comes from the fact that you're disappointed in yourself for dropping out. Don't beat yourself up about these things because they happened/had to happen in the long run. Now you have the opportunity to work on getting yourself back in the game xD good luck