Men: Ever get frustrated with women who are more interested in you after you've both moved on?

[Dilemma Time]

I'm dealing with a nasty feeling tonight that I just can't shake and really can't talk about without the guise of anonymity.

I have a wonderful girlfriend. We've been together for two and a half years. We now live together. It's awesome. She's spectacular.

She actually asked me out first. The only reason this is key is because, while it's worked out great, she's basically been my first and only long-term girlfriend. I messed around some in and after college with girls who were interested in me, but I could never get anywhere with the girls I was interested in myself. I had a plague of what's now called "getting friendzoned."

A while back, I ran into the last girl I dated before my current girlfriend. I really liked her, but our one real date was awkward, I was nervous and we didn't hit it off. She stayed in touch and had occasional friendly communication on social media, even after she met another guy and got married.

One day, I run into her and her husband at an open-air pub. We hit it off so well that day that I nearly forgot her husband was there and that I had a girlfriend. She laughed at my jokes, we had awesome conversation, the whole nine.

I walked away that night and was angry for the next two days. Why couldn't she see the real me way back when? Why didn't she see past the nerves? Why did I have to go so long with failure after failure?

I another such circumstance happened tonight. A girl I liked in college. I didn't pull the trigger on asking her out between the time I met her and when she met Boyfriend #1, but during one of their separations, I asked her to a big formal event and she went with me. Milestone life accomplishment for me that she said 'Yes', but again, nerves, we didn't really hit it off. She and Boyfriend #1 continued their rockiness for another year or so and she broke it off, but quickly found Boyfriend #2, whom she married and moved with out west.

In the process of moving in with my current girlfriend, I found the boutonniere box I had labelled and saved from that formal night. A few days later, she left a note on one of my Facebook posts. I sent her a little message back laughing about having found the boutonniere. She sent me something back, laughing along and saying it was sweet I kept it.

She came back visiting for the holidays tonight and was out with the social circle. I swear, she never gave me more attention than she did tonight. Every time she made a point, she'd make sure to touch my arm or shoulder for emphasis. She was funny and thought I was funny. I felt kind of bad because my girlfriend was right there and I was afraid she'd think we were flirting.

As I had the chance to sit alone tonight, the anger and frustration returned. Yes, it was seven years ago. But I really liked that girl. Yes, I know, I have someone great now, as does she. But why does it have to work so well when there's nothing on the line and after the fact? Why did I have to live through the hurt feelings and pain of thinking I wasn't going to find someone for so long? That was a lot of life I spent frustrated and, when those folks come back and there's such a great connection when nothing's on the line, I feel like, way back then, I was right about my feelings and the girls were either wrong or dumb or whatever then and didn't really give me a fair shake until there was nothing on the line.

Anyone else ever find themselves in this situation and feel this way? Any coping tips?