Trying to leave an abusive ex?

[curvedhot937]

I was in an abusive relationship for almost a year. He had me so brainwashed I always took him back despite the terrible things he did. When I attempted to leave him the last time he forced me to have sex. I never pressed charges because I was too humiluated to let others know what had happened and wasn't prepared to be torn apart in court by a defence lawyer.

One thing I know for myself, and what experts will tell you is that abusers will draw you in and convince you they are the best thing that ever happened to you. Then they will isolate you from family and friends. That makes you easier to manipulate.

I had to cut off all ties altogether. Although I was tempted to check in and see what he was up to (mostly because like you, I wanted him to be miserable) I had to move on. He showed up at my brother's work one day like nothing had ever happened, bragging about his new wife. My brother didn't know about what happened with him and mentioned it to me, which caused an emotional meltdown. It took some counseling to not only figure out why I allowed myself to be with someone like this, but how I could prevent it from happening again.

Terrible things happen in life all the time. As much as you would like to see this man suffer, and as unfair as it is he did this to you, you can't do a thing about it. The more you dwell on it the worse it will make you feel. I suggest talking to a counselor on a regular basis to ensure you won't fall for someone like this again.