Trying to leave an abusive ex?

[Brianna]

The very first thing you do is contact your police department and demand to file a report of abuse. Explain that he has done physical harm and you need a record of that in case he does anything to you in the future. Most abusers, when they realize you aren't coming back, do harm you and you want a record of it. If the police try to talk you out of it, say you are afraid and want it on record in case anything ever happens. it is your LEGAL right to file a report. If you can, ask your dad to come along with you or your mother.

Next step is to ask the officer to get you in contact with the people at the abuse shelter. They will help you find counseling that can actually help you to change and hopefully never accept another abusive relationship. Trust me, if you do not do this part, you will end back up into another bad and abusive relationship. Patterns are hard to see and even harder to break. That's why you need real counseling to help. I know, I went through this with my first marriage.

The simplest way to start to get over a person is to realize that it's easy to romanticize all the great stuff about him and put an end to those kinds of thoughts. Write a large list of every damaging thing he's ever said or done to you. You can add to this list every single time you remember something new. Journal about all the bad times and whenever some good time pops into your head go back and read your list and make sure you remember it like it truly was! Then do all the exercises the counselor tells you to do and that will take the thinking off of him and put it onto yourself and help you fix the problems that helped you get into a long and bad relationship. Call your friends too and say you are sorry it took you so long to see him for who he truly is. but you are ready to put him behind you and need support. You'll be surprised at how many will be waiting for that call and ready to help you. Don't doubt me on that one. Again, I know from experience.