Can I please have your advice on this? Please.?

[Ronnie]

If your own family calls you a scumbag, piece of shit, loser, and embarrassment what would you do? How would you handle it? I"m old enough to move out but its hard because I'm not financial stable to move out on my own and get an apartment right now. Its always hard for me to concentrate with school and work at the same time. I'm not super smart so I have to try extra hard at school. I really do try my best. My brother recently just called me a loser because he goes to a university and is almost done with school and is on the deans list.Then again my brother also kissing my fathers butt and gets everything he wants. He says he works for what he has which I agree but no way could he afford on his own 2 cars and a bike. He works part time for my father and gets paid under the table only $100 a week so my dad buys him everything. I've always been the one to go out and get a job and buy things on my own. Never do I ask my parents for any money. It makes me mad because I really do work hard and no one thinks I do. My brothers both have everything handed down to them. My younger brother gets an allowance of 50 bucks a week and does nothing but play video games. He doesn't do any chores and does a okay job at school. My older brother is going to have my fathers business which is good for him but try worker from the bottom up. Must be nice when everything is given to you. I'm working towards being a nurse but have a ways to go. I'm taking my prerequisites right now. I'm just tried of everyone in my family calling me a piece of shit all the time. It makes me feel worthless and I wish I had never been born. I even feel suicidal sometimes. No, I don't have any friends or anyone in my family that I can speak with about this matter. I feel alone and hopeless. Can I please have some advice? How would you handle it? And if you were to move out would you still be in contact with your family? My family has abused me mentally, physically, and emotionally over the years. I'm drained.