Columbia University Supplement essay feedback?

[Paul]

Sir I too was born in less than perfect surrounds,the Manchester slums but I would never mention the fact in a application to a Uni nor allow it to colour my thoughts on life Yes question the meaning and the purpose of social constructs in a fair and responsible manner but reach no conclusions till you have the knowledge to do so which I take it is why you want to go to uni just tell them you wish to learn how to think not what bto think good luck Bye the way I now live in Sunny Queensland where I surf the gold coast and ski the Snowy mountains life is good do not let where you come from dictate where you are going