How do you maintain dignity after a hurtful unfair breakup? Depressed and desperate...?

[G Parker]

“Love is as powerful as death,” wrote King Solomon. (Song of Solomon 8:6, Today’s English Version) So, breaking up may be one of the most traumatic experiences you’ve ever had to endure. In fact, some have said that a breakup is like a minideath. You may even find yourself going through these and perhaps other typical stages of grief:

Denial. ‘It can’t be over. He’ll change his mind in a day or two.’
Anger. ‘How could he do this to me? I can’t stand him!’
Depression. ‘I’m unlovable. No one will ever love me.’
Acceptance. ‘I’m going to be all right. The breakup hurt, but I’m getting better.’

The good news is that you can reach the acceptance stage. How much time it will take to get there depends on a number of factors, including how long your relationship lasted and how far it progressed. In the meantime, how can you cope with your heartbreak?

You may have heard the saying, Time heals all wounds. When you first break up, those words might ring hollow. That’s because time is only part of the solution. To illustrate: A cut on your skin will heal in time, but it hurts now. You need to stop the bleeding and soothe the pain. You also need to keep it from becoming infected. The same is true with an emotional wound. Right now, it hurts. But there are steps you can take to lessen the pain and keep from becoming infected with bitterness. Time will do its part, but how can you do yours? Try the following.

● Allow yourself to grieve. There’s nothing wrong with having a good cry. After all, the Bible says that there is “a time to weep” and even “a time to wail.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4) Shedding tears doesn’t mean you’re weak. In the midst of emotional anguish, even David—a courageous warrior—once admitted: “Every night my bed is damp from my weeping; my pillow is soaked with tears.”—Psalm 6:6, Today’s English Version.

● Take care of your physical health. Physical exercise and proper nutrition will help replenish the energy lost as a result of the emotional toll of a breakup. “Bodily training is beneficial,” the Bible says.—1 Timothy 4:8.
What areas pertaining to your health might you need to give attention to?
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● Keep busy. Don’t stop doing the things that interest you. And now, more than ever, don’t isolate yourself. (Proverbs 18:1) Associating with those who care about you will give you something positive on which to focus.
What goals can you set?