I am told i am too skinny and need to eat more but i still feel fat, advice please?

[Rebecca]

Hi, Gummy.

It sucks to look in the mirror sometimes, doesn't it? I am a 33 year old mother of three, and I've suffered from size fixation since I was 14 years old. I am 5'2 and I, too, wear a size zero. Sometimes I hate my body so much I want to bury my hands in my hair and pull as I scream.

Here is a trick that I've learned to help calm myself when I get super frustrated:

I want you to ask yourself (you don't have to type the responses unless you find it helpful) "who do I need to be skinnier FOR?" Society has played all kinds of tricks on our minds. TV shows and magazine covers and facebook images have brainwashed us girls and women into thinking that women must be skinny in order to be valued. This is simply NOT true. Go to the mall, or to the park, or anywhere that you'll find crowds of people. Look for women who are smiling, laughing. What do they look like? Are they super skinny? (probably not.) Are they with friends? Are they with boyfriends or husbands? Do they have kids? Theres a very high likelihood that they are loved by many people: men or girlfriends or children, even though they wear a larger size than a zero! They are eating the things that they like, they aren't obsessing over how they look. They are happy!

Those pictures you see on magazines and facebook are very very fake. Those images have been photoshopped so much that they are no longer pictures of humans. They are cartoons. A real person can NEVER achieve those kinds of results. It is impossible.

I know it is hard to keep up a positive perspective. I struggle a little bit every single day. Have you spoken to your parents, or to a teacher about your unhappiness? I visit a psychiatrist every month, which helps me tremendously! She doesn't make me feel stupid at all; she sits and listens to me rant ... and when I'm done I feel so much better. She did prescribe me an antidepressant ... this may or may not be a good idea for you. I'm not a medical professional so I can't give you advice. But I do think you should visit a therapist. Talking about your problems and insecurities is like turning the closet light on: it makes you see that the scary shape was only a shadow that your brain twisted to look like a monster.

Also, is there an alternative option to your depo shot? Different medicines have different side effects. There may be another option which won't affect your thoughts the way the depo seems to be.

Be happy, ok?

Good luck.