How To Get My Boss To Be Better?

[Michael]

Not trying to be rude here, but have you considered the possibility that your boss really might just be that busy? Everything you've said makes it sound like she really is just that busy and doesn't have time to constantly be looking over your shoulder. The solution to your issue #1 is what you're already doing in #3. If she doesn't like it, she'll do something about it, as you said in #4. As far as #2 goes, she's the one who gets to judge whether or not your email is more important than whatever else she's doing, but keeping your emails short and getting to the point within 2 or 3 sentences will increase your odds of getting a response. #5, well, she's the boss, you've just got to live with it.

Her behavior doesn't sound unacceptable, it sounds consistent with a self employed small business owner who is genuinely that busy. Instead of being upset at a lack of direction, take pride that she's trusting you to handle this for her.