Who do control my feeling for a guy I only had sex with in the past?

[hootiemomma31]

You are unhappy in your current relationship and fantasizing about the past, a time when you were happier. Although, I don't think either of these relationships really brought you happiness. It does not sound like either of these men are the "perfect" situation for you or are/ were healthy well balanced relationships. There are a lot of things you could do.
1. You could reach out to him and see if he wants to meet up. It's easy enough to do these days with Facebook and the world wide web. See what happens, you might not still like him once you see him again, or you could get back to being FWBs and cheating on your significant others. If you want to be a cheater and that's not good karma. He never made you his girlfriend before, why would he leave the woman he has two children with for you? Not gonna happen. Most likely if he is interested in seeing you again, it would be just for the sex.
2. You could stay in your current relationship and cheat like your man does until you find someone better who makes you happy.
3. You could end your current relationship and focus your energy on yourself and your child. Go back to school, pick up a hobby, learn to LOVE yourself.

I would choose option number 3 if I were you. Men who don't make you #1, cheat on you or with you, devalue you, or cause you to feel insecure or have low self-esteem are not worth it. Someone will LOVE you and your child in a healthy, balanced, realistic way. If not, then you just have to LOVE yourself.