Calming methods on horseback?

[Darcie Y]

First, remember that horses are always trying to do what they think you want, so if they're not getting it right, "either you asked the wrong question or you asked the question wrong." I know it can be difficult to stay calm when you feel like you just aren't getting through to them and they are more blocking you than trying to figure it out, but you ust have to stop and remind yourself that he is trying. So here's what I do when I get frustrated. I just stop. I don't wait for a good note, I don't finish what I'm working on, I just stop. I don't get off and finish the ride, I just stop and wait until I calm down. While I stop and wait, it does several things: 1) It gives my horse a chance to calm back down. When I get frustrated, my horse can tell and he gets stressed. So stopping and just standing helps him to bring his adrenaline down and start using his brain more. 2) It gives me a chance to think to myself "Why isn't this working? What else could I try? Why is he not doing what I want?" And then you can go and try it again with a different approach. Remember, there's no one way to go about getting a result, and every horse needs something a little different to get the message across. And 3) It gives me a chance to get my mind off things. Usually right after I stop I will go on my phone and look at facebook or something. After taking a short mental break I am able to better analyze the situation without my emotions being so strong, and start to make a new game plan.
Your greatest tool as a rider is your ability to control your emotions and stay calm and logical. If you feel yourself starting to lose that, take a break. Frustration won't help you or your horse. Believe me, I've been there and done that, and re-approaching things after a break with a calm and clear mind is better.
Hope this helps!