I hurt people physically when I'm angry...?

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“Let Go if Anger and Abandon Rage"
The idea of controlling your anger is beautifully expressed by the Bible psalmist David. He said: “Let go of anger and abandon rage; Do not become upset and turn to doing evil.” (Psalm 37:8) The way to avoid saying or doing something that you may later regret is to keep from getting “heated up” in the first place. Of course, that is much easier said than done. But it can be done! Let’s consider three ways that you can get your anger under control.

Reduce Anger's Intensity
To reduce anger, slow down and relax. Try to avoid saying the first thing that comes to mind. If you feel yourself getting overly excited and feel you are in danger of losing control of your emotions, apply the Bible’s counsel: “Beginning a fight is like opening a floodgate; Before the quarrel breaks out, take your leave.”—Proverbs 17:14.

Learn to Relax
“ A calm heart gives life to the body.” (Proverbs 14:30) Applying this basic Bible truth can improve one’s emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Start by learning simple relaxation methods, which help to reduce feelings of anger. The following techniques have proved to be effective in combating stress-related anger:

● Breathing deeply, which is one of the best—and fastest—ways to reduce the intensity of your anger.

● While breathing deeply, repeating a word or phrase that is calming to you, such as “relax,” “let it go,” or “take it easy.”

● Immersing yourself in something you enjoy—perhaps reading, listening to music, gardening, or some other type of activity you find relaxing.

● Getting regular exercise and eating a healthful diet.

Adjust your Expectations
You may not be able completely to avoid the people or the things that act as anger triggers, but you can learn to control your reactions to them. This involves changing the way you think.

People with very high expectations tend to have greater problems with anger. Why? Because when someone or something does not measure up to their high standards, disappointment and anger quickly follow. To combat this perfectionist mentality, it is good to keep in mind that “There is not a righteous man, not even one.” (Romans 3:10) Therefore, we set ourselves up for a sense of failure if we think that we or anyone else can be perfect.

We are wise not to expect too much of ourselves or others. The Bible says: “For we all stumble many times. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man.” (James 3:2) Yes, “For there is no righteous man on earth who always does good and never sins.” (Ecclesiastes 7:20) So if we pretend to be something that we are not—perfect—it will lead to a life filled with frustration and anger.

As imperfect humans, we all get angry from time to time. But how we express our anger is a matter of choice. The apostle Paul cautioned fellow Christians: “Be wrathful, and yet do not sin; let the sun not set with you in a provoked state.” (Ephesians 4:26) Yes, by controlling our anger, we can express our feelings in a positive way, a way that works for the benefit of everyone involved.