why is everything going downhill and how can i be happy again?

[271]

ok where do i start..,.
basically, i had this friend, we became best friends/sisters for the past 2-3 years, and i was always at her house or vice versa, we literally told eachother everything, and we used to always make eachother cry with laughter, however we always used to argue, about everything and anything, and i got annoyed when she hung out with other people, and when we argued i used to get really angry, and say nasty things, or do nasty stuff, or ignore her, but i was always sorry afterwards, but one day, we had an argument, and she just went for me and said she hated me and that she'd had enough, i was literally crushed and confused, i apologised so much, and she managed to get my other best friends on her side, so what happened in the end, was they all ditched me, this all happened when i'd just finished school.. so i apologised again a few days later, but she was being so stubborn and said some truly nasty things, so she wont forgive me EVER and im trying to move on, but i cant even begin to forget and i keep looking on her twitter getting angry with what she comes out with.

also, i havent got on with my mum for a while, and ive been like a prisoner in my room for days, only going downstairs when shes not there, she doesnt care and never makes an effort to sort thing, she just holds a massive grudge, and i hate apologising cause i dont feel like im wrong, what happened was that she was at work, and im at home alot because ive finished school and havent started college yet, and most my friends hate me, and i offer to hoover and tidy the house etc, then when i do, she comes home and critizises it, then she moans, and i found it so rude, so i get angry and start swearing, then basically it led to us not talking to eachother.

i'm meant to be going to my dads this weekend, but he goes away most the time when im there, and im left by myself, i dont mind but when he is there we get on really well and its really cool talking to him, i talk about everything with him, and tis great, but he goes out in the evenings, does this mean he'd rather be out clubbing etc and he prefers that to me? and i tell my mum that hes there sometimes when hes not so that she doesnt have a go at me, for veing a pushover or anything, his excuse is that im 16 and i should look after myself, and i do, but i feel bad that he seems to not want to spend any time with me? most days at the moment consist of me lounging around, chilling, eating and staying upstairs, and its really getting me down, everything is going wrong, am i a bad person? and is this punishment? someone please answer, it'd really help, its all getting me so confused with all of this..

hope someone knows a solution