I will be 28 soon and have nobody in my life. I will die before I become apathetic.?

[nelly]

While I was reading your post I thought for a moment, "Wow, that guy might be the future me."

No, I do not have the tragic experience of watching to parents grow distance from each other because of their inability to remain faithful to each other. My dad is too much of an honest worker and my mother is too nice to do something like that, guilt would over take her, but its easy to see their disgust for each other. They are only together now because of their duty to raise my little sister (as I'm already 18 and in college). What I do have similar to you though is a passion for psychology and an ideal of not using drugs to treat mental disorders. I thought it's amazing I'm not alone in this regard.

Now, looking at your post I would say that you have a conditioned belief that all relationships will end negative note. The roots of this yes would be your parents disputes but it's also due to the fact that you've never made a close friendship to anyone at a young age. It is a reality that there are some relationships that end on a negative not, but I'm a living example that some relationships may end in a positive note or neutral one. It varies upon how you choose to end the relationship and view it afterwards.

My first crush was tragic. I asked this girl I had a crush on since childhood to the homecoming dance and she agreed. Sadly that was a highly stressful time for her and why I confessed at the dance she turned me down and we went home early. I was depressed for around 2 years before I could pick myself back up. Currently I can freely talk to her over facebook, but I've lost common things to talk about. I do post on her status if there's an interesting debate going on.

The second time I asked a girl out was my senior year. At the time she was just a girl I fancied and I wanted to follow the tradition of bring a girl out to prom, so I asked her out. Unintentionally she took it as a signal for dating and suddenly I was in a relationship. Honestly at that point I didn't know what to do. Luckily this girl was mature enough to realize that the relationship was going nowhere and brought that up the exact time I was about to. At prom we agreed that this relationship was going nowhere and we enjoyed the rest of the night. I was never really a close friend with her before the relationship and current not that close as well, but I would say she is one of the people I most respect in this life for being so mature.

I've told you these personal experiences to show you that relationships don't always end in a sour note and they aren't that negative if started and ended maturely. In fact they are growing experiences that helps you learn more about yourself, who you like and who you dislike. Through those two relationships, I've found that I have a taste for mature women, my heart is sensitive to love, I over think things far too often and I have to be more assertive in my relationships. I've grown from them, even though they are over that doesn't mean they were pointless. I wouldn't be trying as hard in school as I am now if it weren't for them.

I've also had 2 confesses to close friends of mines that shut me down on second 1. xD We still talk often over facebook and are continuing in growing our friendship.

Life varies upon how we perceive it and we perceive it differently when we have different belief systems. So try to believe differently. I'm not saying change religions, but to follow a different set of codes than the one you currently follow.