How do I cope with my situation?

[Joseph]

I've lived here in the US for almost 3.5yrs. It's just me and my mom living with my step dad. Our place is quite lonely if I describe it, it's a big house, we're all far apart from each houses.. kinda like a province or a country. About 2 months ago, my mom and I decided to visit my family in the Philippines because of some circumstances.. my grandma felt like she can't live anymore. We stayed there for 40days. The first 3 weeks was boring, but still productive than I am here. I enjoyed being with my family and friends. I thought I was gonna be fine when I get back, but after get back home.. I can't stop thinking I want to go back. I can't stop crying, asking Jesus if he can get me back in time the time I visited the Phil. For a couple of days, I've been crying myself to sleep, checking my facebook and twitter which tends to make it worst. I really want to go back and live there. but I can't. I'm joining the airforce here in the US, and pretty soon im taking my med exam and physical exam. I've passed the ASVAB test and got the jobs I wanted. I'm writing this while I'm crying, I don't know what to do.. I've been dreaming that I was there with my family, playing games and other stuff.. and when I wake up, I feel like I just wanna sleep forever, tears just drops from eyes.. I couldn't even talk to my mom about this...I need help.
I never felt the way I am feeling now the time I left 3.5yrs ago...