I'm paranoid about my Girlfriend, not sure what to do!?

[Fanaticalcattle588]

Okay, so me and my Girlfriend have been together for 9 months or so. To be honest, i love her to pieces and would quite happily do anything for her: I tell her i love her all the time when she's going, when we're kissing: We see each other quite often, four or so times a week (Usually me getting up at 8.15 to see her from her bus)

But anyhow, a few months into our relationship, her xboyfriend commented on her facebook status claiming that he had "got with" her in the Summer, i confronter her regarding this and she told me nothing happened, he's jealous and lying to get back at her (She finished with him a few months prior to our relationship) Anyhow, this was about 3 months in, a few weeks ago she told me they "Lip-locked" and then she walked off and started crying as she felt she cheated on me: He denies this, laughed about it and claimed she did so much more.

Everything goes well for about 4 months more, we was at the hospital getting a morning after pill because the condom split during Sex: We had to wait for 3 hours or so, and then she got called in: the nurse wouldn't let me in with her so my Girlfriend gave me her phone, i was going through our texts we send between us and smiling Ignoring all other texts untill as i was scrolling down there was one saying "Love you " A bit nosey at this unknown number i discovered the conversation. Basically, he had been saying he loves her boobs, she responds saying "if you ask nicely", claiming she misses him loads, loves him lots and oh, love his cock. Completely mortified by this, sat with 10 people around me i couldn't do a thing: I felt so betrayed and heartbroken, my phone recently broke so i forwarded the texts to my best mate so she wouldn't deny it and play mind games, when she came out of the room i made sure she was okay and everything was fine, walking out the hospital her phone went off: ****, delivery notification, balls. She read what i sent and her face dropped, i told her i cant do this anymore and walked home: she followed. Ended up walking into my house and i cried for a few hours and she wouldn't leave. She claimed it was a mistake and will never happen again. (I found out this number is her X

A few weeks ago she was attending this party with her friends, an old 'secondary school group get together' All her friends have started to like me and tried to persuade her to invite me: she was resilient and wouldn't - Suspricious i asked her who is going, she claimed she only knew her friends were going, so i said okay that's fine and bought her some alcohol so she could have a good time - she claimed, I recieve a text at 6pm but apart from that, none until the next day about 4pm, a little worried i tried to hide it; i then found out from her friend that her X boyfriend was there and they wouldn't leave each other alone all night, her friends made sure nothing happened but they were to close and they all felt uncomfortable hating him, and likeing me. But when i spoke to my Girlfriend regarding this, she claimed i'm being paranoid and too jealous.

I don't know what to do anymore, I've lost near all trust in her. She manipulates the scenario to make it look like i'm being paranoid, jealous and over-exaggerating everything, I can't take this: I love her to pieces and i admit, i've become paranoid about it all: I'm not sure if it's justified or if i'm in the wrong, that's how i feel ;/

I told her i want to build our trust back but it's hard, she said she wants to try her hardest to do so too: But yesterday we was cuddling in my bed watching a movie and the X continued to text her, and she kept replying. Previous day to that we had a serious talk regarding that, in which i cried on her should and told her I want to trust her around him, but i feel a hatred when i hear his name, when i see them speaking, or his number on her phone, them speaking on MSN or whatever, i know this isn't right but i just feel so much angar directed at him

She asked me earlier if i'm okay about her going to his house with him and his friend instead of seeing me. I told her i have to build trust between us and the onyl way i can do that is by putting faith in her, I really don't want her to go but i know she will; and if i try to stop her then i'm being paranoid and jealous. I get upset thinking about her with him, as we attend different schools i get told by friends they hang out a lot

She's changed her password and won't tell me what it is (But i've cracked it) and there's silly emails from him like '****** xxxx' etc and it just makes me worry a lot

Please, someone help me :'(