What do you think of my answer to this geography question please?

[Knotty Luke]

Overall a very well structured and coherent response to a broad question.

I think your first paragraph is right on the money. You may want to consider mentioning infectious disease more explicitly - citing the development of vaccination and immunisation, which has resulted in the eradication of certain illnesses e.g. small pox. Improved sanitation and hygiene also played a role in reducing this category as a cause of death.

I would be inclined to move the second paragraph to where you discuss cancer.

Considering the second greatest decrease is in lung and respiratory related deaths. You may want to spend some time on this category. Mentioning the industrial revolution and domestic use of coal to heat homes.

I would agree with you about mentioning social media. Consider changes in lifestyle, self-actualisation and social perception regarding class. I don't believe it too be verbose, you justify your opinions effectively using appropriate language.

Looking back at the Chapter title - 'How does evidence from personal, local and national sources help us understand the pattern of population change in the UK?'

It is challenging to justify social change with facts and figures, however I would consider including some more dates especially regarding the industrial revolution and introduction of new pharmaceuticals.

I imagine this is AS/A-level, if this is the case I believe this is a good response to the question posed.

Don't take my words as gospel - I'm no Geography teacher.
Hope this helps!