Is this the right way to do it?

[geessewereabove]

You are only trying to dream up desires as "love"! You are only 15! When i was growing up couple did not even think of kissing until we were at least in our late teens! And Sex waited until married! Why did you try to make yourself into something you are not, way too young for?
To be "In-Love" ones thoughts would Never think of hurting, leaving another! On either side. Even you have said you fell "in Love" and deeper with another. How could one be
deeper" with another! Impossible!( Even in the Bible it states IF a man even thinks about having sex and is Not married to her - he is sinning! )
To Be" in-Love" you shall have much deeper feelings and so would the girl! Have you ever even prayed to or loved God? If not you have a long way to go! You want to die now? Are you aware in the Bible, thousands of years ago, people use to life HundredS of years? I have a man up the street that is 99 now and will be 100 in Nov.! What would you think of yourself it you read your obituary "killed himself at 15, buried in the non christened grave sight, alone in Hell for ever" ?
Are you aware that Everyone that kills themselves goes strait to Hell?!
Other than wanting sex real young have you ever looked for life and your reason for it? You could end up being a Governor of a state or a leader in the military! You could become well known for your Music! Where would the would be if the Beatles's had never come to be? You could not think of the changes because you have not been here with them. One of their most popular songs "HELP" "I need somebody..." How many people took those words and ran for help or to them to hear them again? Putting millions in places they would not/could nor have been at - IF they had not ever been!
Ask your parents if you can go out and do voluntary work to help others!
How about watching "The Lazarus Phenomenon" on DVD or FREE over the Internet? It about "Life After Death"; of the millions of people that have died, confirmed by a medic, and come back to life. One dead for longer times were shown Heaven, Hell or both!Then came back to life. See what this Hell you are aiming for is like. One stays alone forever with fire burning around them.....