Is it petty to be upset about birthday gifts?

[May]

For my friend's birthday present I paid for her to get her nails done. I did this for her kind of late, about two months afterwards because I hadn't seen her during that time. It came out to about $40 including tip, plus I said it was okay for her to get a design done as well which added on to it.

Then my birthday was at the end of October but we didn't see each other then. About two weeks ago we talked about hanging out and I said we should get our nails done. She said, "I just got my hair done and gas filled so I don't have much $, but I'll take you to get your nails done."

So it turns out what she meant supposedly by saying "I'll take you to get your done," was she would give me a RIDE to get them done because when it was time to pay she stood back from the paying counter in back of me and I had to paid for them!!

Looking back i realized that the last two years (counting this year) I paid for her nails to get done for her bday, and she hasn't done anything for mine. it was pretty disappointing that she didm't take my to get my nails done too. i mean it's not even all about the money… it's about the thought too

She put on twitter since then, that she went to get her own nails done and went shopping… which means she's used money on herself and made an excuse not to do anything for me supposedly because of not having enough money..

would you be upset if you were in this situation? or is this a questionable friend? Im not going to say anything to her about it, but I can't help but be kind of mad that she did this.

[Dragonmistress]

I would be GONE. Once, ok maybe something unexpected happened. Reading about how she's doing stuff and has no clue when it comes to friends? Find another friend.

[Spunky101]

This should become a giftless friendship. Don't get her anything for her birthday from now on except a card. Maybe. That way, you won't feel cheated when she fails to reciprocate. If she has the gall to ask about a gift or her nails, simply say that you didn't want to make her uncomfortable because she clearly doesn't have the money to acknowledge your birthday. That should shut her up.

[miniatureairplane837]

Stop letting this worry you and let it go.There is no reason to ever buy her a gift again now

[chickadee34]

She sounds very self-centered and not much of a friend. At the very least, I would quietly stop giving her birthday presents.

[Cynthia]

It's pretty thoughtless of her. I'd give her a card only for her birthdays from now on. Obviously SHE doesn't see how rude she is so maybe she is clueless. I'd still be pissed a little and a little hurt but if ya'll are good friends I wouldn't say anything. It seriously is possible that she doesn't realize that shes self absorbed. Good luck!

[Mabe]

It isn't questionable that she doesnt mind getting a gift from you, but she does mind giving you one. If you don't think the friendship is about money, then stop buying her presents, and you will see how it goes.

[de Chicago]

I had something very similar happen with a friend of mine. For her birthday I would get her a nice gift (costing about $50), a card, and I would take her out to lunch. I became really disappointed when she didn't get me anything one year, not even a card. I got her a gift the next year too, again she ignored my birthday. All I got was a text message saying Happy Birthday. This happened for several years.

I asked a question on here and someone very wise told me to stop buying her gifts and treat her the same way she treats me. This year, I didn't get her anything for her birthday, just an e-mail. She was obviously shocked but she didn't say anything. I mean, what can someone like that say? Why didn't you get me a gift when I get you nothing not even a card?

[Common Sense]

It does seem that she is a taker.

Do not acknowledge her birthday with any sort of gift again.

I realize we don't give gifts to get gifts, but when someone makes excuses not to reciprocate, then it is clear they are using you.

[Charlotte]

I would be GONE.