How do I get over procrastination?

[Vauhn]

Jhello!!
I'm a bit curious and worried at the sand time. I was wondering how I can kick procrastination. I admit that I am pretty effin lazy. I want to do something but my body which tells my brain--or vice versa--to not do it.
If I say to myself: 'you have to do it'. My body/brain will say: 'uh uh, nope! No you're not '
I also tell myself: 'If you do it, something will come out of it'
My body/brain will say: 'I know you don't wanna do it '
Then my body will start feeling weak and then I start feeling tired and just plop myself on the couch and do nothing but relax. School drains me, I don't like being there. It's tiring as hell. But I don't want to be at the point in procrastination where I can't take care of myself and be the person that lives with my mother until I'm over the hill (50 years old). I wanna go to college and get a nice paying job and support myself. I'm in the 9th grade again because of it. I go to tutoring and ask for help. I'm just not motivated.

[Jim]

Now let’s look at your procrastination.
You’re making a decision with your conscious mind and wondering why you’re not carrying it out. The truth is the real decision maker – Rex – is not nearly so mature. Imagine you had to constantly convince a young child to do what you wanted. For simple actions, asserting your authority might be enough. “It’s time for dinner”. But if that child doesn’t want to do something, it won’t listen.

You need to cajole it:

Forget logic. Once you’ve decided to do something, logic and rationale won’t help you. Your inner reptile can be placated, scared and excited. But it doesn’t speak with language and cannot be reasoned with.
Comfort matters. If you’re hungry, tired or depressed your baby reptile will rebel. Fail to take care of yourself, and he’ll wail and scream and refuse to do a damn thing you say. That’s what he’s for. Eat, sleep and make time for fun.
Nurture discipline. Build a routine of positive and negative reinforcement. If you want a child to eat their vegetables, don’t give them dessert first. Reward yourself for successes, and set up assured punishments for your failure. Classic examples include committing to a public goal, or working in a team – social pressure can influence Rex.
Incite emotion. Your reptile brain responds to emotion. That is its language. So get yourself pumped, or terrified. Motivational talks, movies and articles can work, for a while. I use dramatic music (one of my favourite playlists is called Music to conquer worlds by). Picture the bliss associated with getting something done, or the horrors of failing. Make your imagination vivid enough that it shakes you. We use similar tricks on children for a reason: “brush your teeth or they’ll fall out”.
Force a start. The most important thing you can do is start. Much of Rex’s instincts are to avoid change, and once you begin something those instincts start to tip into your favour. With enough time, you can even convince Rex to love doing the things he hated. There’s a reason we force kids to go to school or to try piano lessons.
Bias your environment. Rex is short sighted and not terribly bright. If he sees a Facebook icon, he’ll want it. It’s like showing a child the start of a cool TV program immediately before bedtime. Design your environment to be free from such distractions: sign out of instant messenger, turn off notifications, turn off email. Have separate places for work and fun, and ideally separate computers (or at least accounts).
Once you know what to look for, you’ll start to recognise the patterns and control them.

There’s an impulsive baby reptile in your