How do I communicate with my boyfriend's daughter on facebook?

[Respectedtest480]

My long distance boyfriend and I are getting engaged soon, so he told me he thinks it best for me to bond with his daughter too, she added me on facebook yesterday but honestly I don't know how to proceed, Iam kind of nervous that she might not like me. What's the best way of beginning a conversation on facebook with your future step daughter? Please help!

[?]

How old is she? That affects alot. I would do nothing more than ask questions about her day. Offer no advice. And definitely off no criticism. Have you met her face to face? He should be taking the lead on this,

[no mercy]

why does it matter whether she will like u? u re not getting married with her. so she does not like u,. will he dump u just because of that? then maybe u don't need such a bf. also here is a revelation for u: she already does not like u. just because u re the other woman - the other means not her. and he will divide his attention between u and her, nobody would like to feel number second. so I think u should tell him u will try and bond with her when u meet her. what on earth will u talk to someone's child? my sincere advice: don't talk to her on facebook

[Gone Fishing]

Be yourself... Act like someone your not, you will just be a fake in her eyes. Start off with "Hi im -name-, its nice to finally get to talk to you."

Let that be the punch line.

[Sue C]

I don't know how old she is, but you could tell her you're looking forward to meeting her. Ask her to tell you a bit about herself. What are her favorite things to do. IF in school, what's her favorite subject, what kind of movies does she like, what kind of music/groups does she like, is she into sports, if so what ones. Just get into a general conversation with her so you'll better know her. See how she responds back to you & pretty much take it from there. She'll either be a "talker" or not. Only time will tell. I wouldn't get concerned about it tho. As I said, it all depends on her age...best to you, honey...

[hmmm]

Try to establish a friendship relationship with your step daughter. Let her know that its safe and that you are not trying to steal her dad love from her nor are you trying to replace her mother. Make it clear that you want a friendship with her. Perhaps you can start by commenting on some of her comments/pics. Or get her involve with the wedding planning, ask her if she would like to help you out? Don't start by interrogating her life... let her warm up to you little by little. Perhaps, you may ask her if you can do a video conferencing and ask her what her thoughts between you and her dad. What are her expectations of you. Good luck

[Jennifer Lu22]

Tell her a lillte about you, like what music you like make it age approiate. REMEMBER SHE HAS A MOTHER AND IT ISNT YOU. Stepmoms are known to be evil, so dont be mean but dont buy her live either. Building a frienddhip takes time. See if she plays any games on facebook and send her the free gifts. Take the time to ask her how her day is after school.

[Tomster]

why is this long distance? have you actually met before? if all of this has only ever been over distance so far, end it now. if its only been distance for a while because of work or such but you were previously together for much of your time, then ok. in my opinion, people who look long distance for a relationship are not looking for love but escape of some sort, running away, to a stronger economy, from reality. online offers all of this while still living your normal life, including other people to date which happens close to 100% of the time.

to the daughter thing? if you cant make that happen naturally, you cant make it happen at all. probably most of your contact with her should be done in the presence of your boyfriend, you two do the talking or texting while letting her join when she feels like it so you can learn how she reacts and acts with her dad just like you would if you were all in the park together.