Can anyone give me any advice and ask me if I am doing/saying/thinking anything wrong here?

[swelwynemma]

Well, I was talking to a friend of mine who has been feeling suicidal (not sure how long for) and has been to see the police a lot over the past three weeks. I think she's at hospital now (she had a breakdown and tried to kill herself).

I was on her Facebook profile having a nose earlier this evening and saw she'd joined a group against child sex abuse.

I've seen she's joined a few anti-child sex abuse groups so I'm wondering if maybe that's why she's feeling suicidal? She's told me she feels like she has mental health problems too (I have Aspergers' Syndrome, she has autism).

She's quite open with me when we talk (online - we've never done so IRL or on the phone) and I want to be there as best I can for her. How do I go about doing so and what should I say when she talks about killing herself?
She's 15/16 if that's any help.... I'm wondering if a small part of it might be to do with your hormones going mental when you're a teenager.
When she told me how she was planning on killing herself, I told her that I'd miss her like crazy and that she made me think in ways I'd not really thought before (both of which are true).

I didn't say in any more detail why she shouldn't kill herself. Did I say too much?

[mktk401]

she's being molested...leave it alone.

[Karina]

Maybe you should call on the phone. online help is not that comforting when you are at the end of your rope.

[Elizabeth K]

Always take it seriously when anyone threatens suicide. If she's at a hospital that's good, it's where she should be now.

[Loves L]

If she's in a sexual abuse therapy/ support group tell her she needs to contact the groups leader or her sponser.She needs to be getting professional help right now.Someone wanting to kill themselves isn't normal and you can't, as an individual do much to help them except to refer them to a suicide hotline etc.

[friendlyadvice]

Listen to her problems. Tell her that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Tell her that there is nothing that happens to her in life that is worth ending her life. You can ask if there is anything she wants to talk about and that you will try to help her. There are child abuse groups that would find her shelter, a place to live, where she would no longer be abused. Tell her that obstacles are brought to each one of us in life, not to make us despair, but for us to learn from and grow stronger from. Tell her that she must have a very strong soul to have such challenging problems brought to her. Tell her that you know she is strong enough to learn and get past her challenges.

[untimelyfarewell]

Well the first thing is to always talk to her with consideration. People who are suicidal aren't usually receptive of lectures or lists of why suicide is not the answer, most of these people know all of this already. The best way to be there for her is to listen, as much as you can. If she asks questions, then answer, but try not to just go on and on talking. Listening can help a lot. Also, is she seeing a therapist, a counselor, anyone? If not, I would suggest you recommend she sees one, but make sure it's said with a good intention so she doesn't think you think she's nuts. Just try to be understanding, and let her know that you're there for her. Also, make sure she knows how much she means to you when she's talking about killing herself. She needs to hear that during those times because she probably isn't thinking logically when suicide's on her mind. Talk her through it and DO NOT LEAVE HER until you're completely sure she's recovered or at least stable enough not to worry about, even if it takes hours. I know it sounds like a lot of work, but that's the price of friendship/love.

[breakznjungle]

The best thing you can do is to continue being a good friend and listening to what she is saying to you. Try to be a positive presence in her life (it seems like she doesn't have many), and reassure her that there are reasons to continue living. Aspergers is characterized by difficulties with social interaction so she may feel very alone and depressed, and if she was indeed abused these things compound and can spiral out of control. If you know her personally you should ask her about the abuse and find out if she's reported it (probably not). Psychological disorders are tricky so you have to tread lightly, offer good advice and just be there.