What should I do about feeling unappreciated at work?

[Kayla]

I've literally given everything for my job. I don't have a social life, I hardly see my family and friends, and if my boss asks me to do her a favor, I drop everything and do it without complaint. I devoted myself to this job. And lately, I've really started to notice that I get nothing in return. My boss never compliments me for doing good work, but I'll hear from my coworkers that she's always making nice comments about me when I'm not around, and one time she said to someone else that she doesn't know what she would do without me; but she tends to nitpick and point out minor details that she thinks are wrong when they really don't matter. If I do one tiny thing wrong, I get hell for it - but the other 99.9% of the time that I do my work perfectly, it goes unacknowledged.

I guess this was bound to happen, with me being so dedicated and loyal to this job, when my boss never seems to appreciate me. I've been looking for another job, but it's tough to find anything right now. I don't know what to do. I just want some recognition for all the hard work I've put into this stupid job. Like I said, I gave up my life for it, and my boss doesn't seem to give a shit.

[T]

Haha grow up, you're getting paid, that's your return.

[coraann]

Suggest that it is time you were given a raise.

[nora]

Definitely, ask for a raise. Also, ask for an honest review of your work. This will give your boss a chance to tell you all the things she likes about what you are doing. If you don't get either of those things or even if you do, continue to look for other employment. The sort of person who never says how they appreciate you is unlikely to change. Rather than waiting for her to be different, be proactive and go find a boss or situation that will appreciate your commitment. There are lots of companies wanting employees who are invested. You are a catch for the employer.

[Simpson G]

Ok, if you aren't getting back what you need, then it's time to start making changes in how much you invest. Sorry, but unless gutting your social life and personal life was part of the job description, you are letting yourself get taken advantage of. No more dropping everything. No more taking after hours phone calls unless it's a true emergency. Start making plans. Join a gym. Start volunteering. Do stuff for yourself. You need to shift this idea that all you deserve is work. You deserve more.

Boss: Kayla, I need you to stay to get a head start on that marketing report
You: I have plans tonight, but I am happy to get started first thing tomorrow morning. It can wait until 9am, right?

Boss: Kayla, I have 73 projects that need attention by Friday.
You: I'd be happy to help. Can you tell me which projects are priority? I can't work this weekend, but I will do my best to help with the most important projects for the rest of the week.

Boss: Kayla, I have an urgent project that I need your help on.
You: I'd be happy to help, but I'm currently working on project 1 with Bob. I'm kinda swamped with it. Should I let Bob know that I need to work on this project? When do you think I'll be done with this one so I can let Bob know?

Jobs like this tend to give annual reviews and raises. If you aren't currently doing this, ask for it. Ask for feedback on what you are doing right and what you can work on.

You can't devote everything to your work. You will wake up at 45 or 50 and realized you haven't lived.

[mrreliable3599]

If you're being paid well and your boss talks you up to other people, that's quite a reward right there. She's elevating your reputation.

One thing that's easy for bosses to do is assume their employees know how valuable they are. I know that from personal experience. I had an employee that I considered highly valuable. They told me one time they felt I didn't appreciate anything they did. It woke me up. Now I make sure I let my employees know how much I appreciate them.

If she's telling other people how good you are, she probably thinks you know how much she appreciates you. It's awkward to tell her to praise you more often, but just understand she does appreciate you, she's just not good at expressing it.

If she's not paying you well, it's your responsibility to ask for a raise.