I feel like I'm trapped with my friends?

[george]

Before you start reading I would just like to say that I have gone into a (what i think) bit of depression over the past few days and have been considering cutting - I think this is due to my friends.

Recently I've been feeling really down on myself - I think it's because of my friends. I've been hanging around with these 3 girls for 3 years, sitting with them at lunch/break, texting and phone calling all the time... but since September I've just felt really different. I'm going to call them J, E and M because I don't want to give you their real names. Anyways, whenever I sit with them at lunch I sometimes feel left out, J and E often make remarks about me, I know that they're not being serious but the amount they do it makes me feel like crap, they constantly talk about each other behind their backs to me so it makes me think that they probably do the same about me behind my back which constantly makes me concuss, and it drives me up the wall, I am also oftenly having my phone snatched out of my hand by J and then having her going through all of my photos and instagram and invading my personal space. She does this constantly, and if I ask for my phone back she NEVER gives it back, she just says that I'm over reacting when this happens at least once every two days, I feel like I can't even take out my phone, as if she doesn't snatch it, she asks for it and I usually say no, but for some reason she gets so offended and says "I won't do anything" and I can tell that she's getting pissed off and I HATE controversy, so I just give her my phone so she doesn't get angry at me and push me out for the rest of the day (which has happened two or three times before)...
In September I had had enough because I was in a really bad mood that day and J said to me "What are you doing on twitter, bitching about us?" when I had done nothing to her, so I just got up and left and hung around with this other group of girls who I'm really good friends with. I did this for 3 weeks but couldn't take it because the new group of girls who I stood with stood very close to J, E and M at break, this led me to constantly hearing them (what i think) fake laughing, taking loudly and so on... I think it was to try and make me jealous but I'm not sure. But because this led me to feel even more worse about myself I finally went up to them and said sorry. I said sorry because I wanted to stop fighting, not because I actually felt sorry, they accepted my apology and I was about to walk off when they told me to sit down, I knew I couldn't say "Oh sorry I'm going to hang around with the other group of girls" because I knew exactly what would happen - they would just ***** about me and not accept my apology and probably take the piss out of me for being so 'pathetic' for saying sorry... I sat down with them and it took about 2 weeks for them to treat me like they had before. During those 2 weeks I hardly joined into convocation as they purposely made me feel like an outsider.
I don't know what to do, some days I can have fun with these girls but some days I can feel really really down after a day of school and it's on my mind all night. I just don't need it, but because school is such a close environment and I'm seeing J, E and M all around school, I just don't want it to be like those 3 weeks when I wasn't friends with them. But I've just had enough, E is one I can still be friends with whatever happens really because she is sensitive, and I really do like her as a person when she's not with J, I could say the same about J to be honest... J is not as aggressive and quick-to-judge when she's alone. They turn each other into something completely different. And M, she doesn't talk much so I know I wouldn't talk to her much if I stopped hanging around with them. So what should I do? If it wasn't for school I would litterely say goodbye and move on, but because we're always so close to each other I know it will just be awkward for the next 2 years of school. I don't know what to do, it's not always bad with them 3, but I would say that the good and bads equal out, when with my other group of friends there are really only goods. What should I do? I feel trapped. All help is appreciated, thank you.

[Punk77]

I get what your talking about because the same thing sorta happens to me and the depression thing is something I can kinda relate to. I didnt do much about it... srta stayed quiet for a bit. It eventually wasnt as bad but I still sorta get the same treatment. I think (this is personal opinion by the way so if you don't like it then I don't mind, you don't have to take my advice) u should go with your other group of friends... I would maybe tell them what's happening if you havent already. Don't feel bad about the other girls and if you do then just read your question over and you can see what they've done. I have a friend outside school who knows about everything and is really supportive so if you have anyone like that then ask them for help.
Hang in there!

[tehabwa]

YOU are the one trapping yourself.

Don't hang out with them any more. They are horrible and abusive people.

No, it won't be awkward for TWO YEARS. It will be awkward for a while, but not two years.

The only other option is to be honest about why you don't want to be friends with them any more -- tell all of it: taking my phone and invading my privacy; trash-talking; leaving me out; all the various rude things.

Do it with E; if necessary, also with J; and if you want, M, but M doesn't seem to be the problem.

End by saying that it isn't worth the misery to continue to be friends with them. Then walk away. If they tell you to sit, keep walking.

You don't owe them anything; they are horrible; get them out of your life.