Why is my best friend acting strange towards me?

[Bob]

My best friend is a girl and I'm a guy.

We've been best friends for about half a year now.

However, the past month or two she's been acting different. We would always talk everyday, on Facebook, Whatsapp whatever, But now, she's sometimes ignoring my messages (before we used to reply all the time), she's giving me cold responses, our conversations don't last.

She didn't come to my birthday either, despite me telling her it would be on either a Thursday or Friday, once I confirm it's a Friday, she said she couldn't make it until after 9. Fair enough, but she knew it would be either of the two days, and before she definitely would have told me what day she couldn't make it. So I text her at 9pm that day, saying where we all were, she replies with that she's got a meeting to go to.

Next day she apologizes to me about 9am in the morning through a text, saying she couldn't make it, and by the time her meeting was finished all the pubs were closing. Ok that's fine, then I say to her if you're not too busy then why not meet up next week? She says that's fine, give me what days you'll be free and I'll get back to you. The week is over, and she didn't get back to me at all about it, yet she creates an event on Facebook for someone that's leaving our work, and confirms she's going to that straight away while she didn't do that for my birthday event at all. Add to that, another mutual friend who's leaving to go back to Australia created a nightout event on Facebook because he's leaving, and she puts going to that straight away.

I don't know if she talks to other people properly or not, I think she does as a few things indicate that, but I know she's going through a rough time. She broke her leg and it wasn't healing, she had to get surgery for it when she went back to her home country in Germany. She didn't tell me this, and I asked her why, she said because she just found out, yet I heard this information from someone else. We talked that day, we had a little fight as I asked her why she was being strange acting weird, she says she's acting 'weird to everyone right now'. Fine. So then I tell her to tell me when her surgery is and how it goes. I give her space, don't talk to her for a little over a week, and she never got back to me. Had to ask how it went, turns out she already had the surgery done a week back. Then I ask her when she's coming back to the UK where she currently lives, said she didn't know and would let me know as soon as she does. Doesn't tell me that either and had to find out she's back when I saw her brother shopping at our workplace.

I've not seen her ever since she went to Germany and came back, and that's been about a month, nor have I talked to her properly since then due to the way she's acting. I stopped talking to her as I felt she needed space for a week or two, she didn't even notice, I don't message her everyday or anything, just like once or twice a week to see how she's getting on, still get cold answers. If she can go to other people's leaving do's but not my birthday, and then can't find a day free to meet up after it despite saying she's going to the others nighouts tells me something is very wrong.

We used to be so close, like a brother and a sister, but now, now it feels as if we're just distant friends. She seems talk to a few people on Facebook, she would always comment on something that I would post on her wall or if mutual friend and I would have some banter she would join in with hers. Now I don't get that either, but she does it a little with other friends I don't know whether to ignore her to see if she notices or call her? The two nightouts are coming up on Sunday the other on next Friday.

I can't think of anything that I did to annoy her, I was moody for a while and apologised to her about it she said it was fine, we had that little argument about her acting weird before she went to Germany and not telling me about the surgery, but we seemed to have resolved that.

Any advice?

[postal p]

She does not want to tell you, or anyone what happened in Germany. She might be too embarrassed about it.