Is my wife having a lesbian affair her friend?

[J.]

Married for 3 years, 2 kids (2.5 year, 1 year). Known my wife for 8 years. Lately she's changed a lot. She avoid sex , in the last 4 months , we've had sex 3 times only. She says she's tired, she goes to sleep early. When she goes to work she dresses very sexy, skirt, thong...etc. At home, she's more conservative. She's very close to one of her co-worker. When she's home, she'd text her, hit her up on social media. Lately, she would find excuses to go see her at her second job, saying that she's going to buy something. What is supposed to be 15 minutes changes into an hour and 15 minutes. I found out that she lied to me at least twice just to go see her friend. I don't know if she's having a lesbian affair or she uses her friend as a cover up for an affair with a guy, but something is up. Her friend has a boyfriend. My wife never gave me a hint that she might be a lesbian, she's actually hint that she didn't like that "lifestyle". She's a great mother, show off our family picture on social media and would like to have another child in one year or two. My problem is the lack of intimity( she actually avoids me), the lies when she doesn't need to, her "obsession" with her lady friend (who's 10 year older than her). I am gonna sit down and have a talk with her. What do you guys think, is she having a lesbian or otherwise affair. How should I confront her? Thank you in advance.

[Patrick]

Divorce and bankruptcy or not I would put my foot down or else. Its your quality of life too. My wife told me to stop drinking or else so I stopped. If you cant have companionship then whats the point? If I can change over night then she can too. I will get some thumbs down for this but hey, its 2014 and time for changes for the better. Pay the support and see the kids when you can.

[Tartersauce]

Sitting down to talk is a waste. Women in this situation need to be shocked. Next time she gets all dolled up for work, jokingly say, "Getting dressed up for [friend's name]?" You'll be able to tell a lot by the reaction on her face. Laugh and talk about how they should make a porno - hot office ladies, or whatever is applicable.

[medancin2]

it is possible that she is having an affair but put that aside for a moment. what you need to address is your relationship- if she is avoiding intimacy with you then yes something is going on. was this happening before she met this friend? if so then she is not the reason. For most women sex is emotional (especially in a long relationship) and if she is not happy then that would be off the table. Who wants to have sex with someone that they are a. mad at, b. disappointed in, c. disgusted by, or many other reasons.She may not even realize it right now. I was married for 23 years and had the same happening to me (hindsight) I now realize that I had lost respect for my husband for a lot of reasons.(everyone was 1st before me) and I didnt want to have sex with him at all. Once it all fell apart we talked brutally honest with each other.. this is a must if you wish to save your marriage. get a babysitter to take the kids somewhere and have an honest discussion at home. hide the car keys, turn off the phones etc. She will try to run away from the brutal honesty but it is so very necessary.. good luck to you!

[Tony Spillerssr]

If your wife is having an affair with another woman is called bi an if you ask her she might answer yes don't be upset get interested in her new ventur you might be suprise if she invites you in