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Should I Give Flowers to a Girl With a Boyfriend on Valentine's Day?
03-24-2014, 10:13 AM
Post: #1
Should I Give Flowers to a Girl With a Boyfriend on Valentine's Day?
I work with a girl who has a boyfriend that lives several states away. She is extremely cute and we get along very well although we only ever see each other at work. I think she likes me because she always stares at me and smiles for no reason while we're working but I've never done anything to get in the middle of her relationship. I tried adding her on Facebook when I first met her and she took me off her friends list a day later because her boyfriend doesn't like her talking to other guys.

So anyway, one time while I was out on the lot, this limousine pulled up and a girl got out and gave me a white rose. She said she was on a game show and told me to give it to someone I loved. I was kind of confused but she ran off before I could ask questions. I wasn't really in love with anyone so I gave it to this cute girl I'm talking about. I said "this is for you" and explained what had happened. She just took it and thought it was funny/interesting.

Now Valentine's Day is coming up and I thought it would be the perfect chance to do something special. I want to buy a single white rose and maybe a box of chocolates then inconspicuously leave it in the breakroom with her name on it. I won't tell her or anybody that it's from me. I'm afraid of how she might react though because I've never done anything so straightforward with her. I don't have anything against the boyfriend, I just really like this girl. Good or bad idea?
@Mogas: You're dead wrong about a lot of things. You seem to think I hit on her constantly and make her uncomfortable. No. We share a mutual friendship and actually like one another. This would be the only thing close to flirting with her I've done so far. Even so, there's a difference between doing nice things for someone and hitting on them. If she chose never to talk about it, we never would. The ball is in her court, always. I'd be sad but I would respect her feelings and get on with my life. And I'm not worried about anything you mentioned. My managers love me, it's completely normal here to date your coworkers, her boyfriend does not intimidate me at all, and I would never make her have to decide on the spot whether or not to jeopardize her relationship by asking her to go on a date with me. Also, why would I want to think about breaking up with the girl before I even get the girl? You really are a pessimist!

P.S. Thank you, Jania & D for your answers.
@Mogas: I'm looking to be advised, not berated. You assumed a bunch of stuff that wasn't true and you're still assuming. You're supposed to be helping me out but you're chastising me. That's not how this site works. If someone asks what the best way to skin a deer is and somebody else replies with "hunting is wrong, don't do it" then they're not using the site correctly.

FYI she took me off her friends list because she didn't want to upset her boyfriend. It didn't have anything to do with me. Secondly, I'm pretty sure she already knows I like her. It's just never been talked about between us yet. So when you say she has never done anything to encourage me, why then does she continue to talk to me and mess around with me at work even after I've done things like given her compliments, shared lunches with her, etc?

@James: I know man, but the last thing I'm trying to do right now is make her break up with her boyfriend.

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03-24-2014, 10:19 AM
Post: #2
 
Lolz that's super cute. You know what? She's definitely going to start liking you more if you do that. However it's going to confuse her. If she dating him long distance then she's committed. This thing between you guys may lead to mistakes and ruin the friendship.because she'll feel horrible. I thin she probably does need you right now though so try being her friend first. Do it and tell her you just want to be friends with a girl like her

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03-24-2014, 10:26 AM
Post: #3
 
She is still with her boyfriend for a reason. It could get very complicated and if she is committed to her boyfriend, you are going to get in a bad situation and you could lose her as a friend. Find out if she has any doubts about her boyfriend, and if she does, this could help you to win her over, if she doesn't I would suggest you stay out of it.
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03-24-2014, 10:33 AM
Post: #4
 
Bad Idea on sooo many different levels! This girl has a boyfriend! My bet, if he was in town, you would behave yourself! She TOOK her name off your Facebook Friends list! She has really said NOTHING to you that she is available! You are bringing problems to her at her work place! Has not anyone ever told you not to dip your pen in the company's ink? Trying to date girls where you work is generally a bad idea. What happens if you do date her for a while then you break up? The work place then becomes a battle ground! There are plenty of other "cute" girls without boyfriends you can hit on! My feeling is your going to make her feel uncomfortable at work and she or her boss will have to put you in your place! Keep the chocolates and rose the hell out of the work place! This is where people ( that girl) go to make a living! This is not a club of a place to hit on the girls. All you have to do is ask her out to lunch or dinner but you have not done that! Why not? afraid of rejection? or afraid she may tell her boss or boyfriend there is a guy (you) bothering her at work? Why are you not using your common sense here? My bet, her BF or boss will bring your common sense right back into focus or send your poor judgment butt home! Who needs these problems at work! You sound really immature!

LOOKING AT YOUR RESPONSE to my answer pretty much says it all! you did not want any advice buy only justification of what your doing! You forgot to reiterate that she took you off her Friend list on face book, she has a boyfriend, she has never encouraged you! Your excuse that your managers (love) you at work so you don't worry about your behavior towards another employee is also wrong! You wanted ppl to answer your question and I stand by my answer. If you do not like the answers but only looking for validation then perhaps you should have said so and not wasted time of people that do not agree with you.
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03-24-2014, 10:40 AM
Post: #5
 
If you get this girl to leave her boyfriend for you, you are always going to wonder if someday she might do the same thing to you with another guy.
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