I feel like a horrible person and wonder should I send him his birthday present and an apology.?

[Bubbly but]

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I ruined my friendship I'm thinking about suicide?
I'm 18 and a girl

I had been going to my first high school stoner party ( I'm out of highschool but my friend/ ex wasn't)

Well there was alchohol and pot, and I smoked a bit and drank nearly a whole thing of vodka And ended up blacking out. I woke up covered in vomit and to him telling me it's over.

Evidently I supposedly flirted with his friend and bitched at him and evidently ruined the whole night for him. They dumped me on a mountain and wouldn't take me to get my phone to get a ride and I ended up having having to walk to an unfamiliar house in the rain.

All because I needed a ride home and they were gonna take to some other party.

He dumped me off at places, his friend tried to take advantage of me.

Also I had to wake up these poor older people he left me with and I told them I'm sorry and they said they understood. I was really nice to all the adults and everyone but him when he started griping.


The next day I griped at him he texted me I'm nothing but a whore and wasted his time etc. I was rude and ruined anything and he was like my best friend.

And I've never been so hurt or treated so cruelly ( I isually drink with older friends though)

My hearts broke because he acted like he really cared for a long time, I think I just embarrassed him cause he deleted his Facebook etc. but the thing is is that even though I was drunk no one should ever be that horrible to another human, nothing I could have done could've bed. That bad enough for him to completely cuss me out and delete me from his life.

I didn't have sex or kiss or do anything.

Is he just a stupid 16 year old kid or am I bad?

He said he believes his friends over me, and that he never wants to see me again. I just hate myself for getting so drunk and I don't know what I did I know for a fact I didn't slut around though. I know apologized so much but I ****** up everything I hate my life I want to die.


I said horrible stuff to him the next day and I was so hungover and confused by what I remember I hate myself I'm evil. There's nothing I can do to make it up, I made a whole group of people hate me?

I drink seldom but this has never happened blacking out before.


I said right down vile evil horrible things the next day too.


I bought him a birthday gift prior and I'm thinking about writing a letter of apology to make myself feel at ease though I know I can never recover our friendship

[MidsummersEssence]

Honey if he is asinine enough to leave you in the middle of nowhere like that then he don't deserve your gift nor apology. That is an ass**. We all make mistakes. Most of us have made an ass out of our selves at one time or another at a party. It is a part of like. I would seriously watch about getting that drunk again though. It is not healthy. The thing is there is no excuse for the way this boy acted. You don't want someone like that and it is better you found out that he was that way now then in a worse situation. Take care honey and it is not the end of the world. I promise. Keep your chin up and move on.

[Joe]

A true friend will be there when you need them. He abandoned you when you were needing help.
I'm not sure he is your friend at all.

You are still young at 18 and experiencing things for the first time. Drinking hard liquor is something that is best done in moderation. It will get you drunk very quickly and make you do things that you would never do normally. You are not responsible for what went on that night.

Try to find older friends to spend time with. You have no obligation to send him a birthday gift.

" I'm thinking about suicide?"

You have too much to do and experience to even think about ending your life. Look for what you enjoy doing and do it with a passion. It could be art, writing or just exploring.

You will find that what seems overwhelming today is easily resolved tomorrow.