How to handle his female friends?

[Firecracker]

Well my guy is friends with someone I do not like him hanging out with. I told him I'm not comfortable if it's just the 2 of them hanging out, but if it's a group I can accept it. Basically (and I'm embarrassed to admit) I have been stalking her twitter and instagram for any evidence that they hang out (I don't have accounts but hers were public). I have had a few little suspicions but nothing concrete. NOW she has put her instagram on private!!!! I'm kinda freaking out because how can I keep tabs on them now?? He does not know I do this and I would never tell him. A little background: She used to be my friend but when he and I started dating, she continued to get close to him and I felt that was inappropriate/not respectful of boundaries or our friendship. There's some other stuff too but he won't end the friendship with her and she's apparently too dumb to back off. It makes my blood boil to imagine them together hanging out, even as friends ahhh. She is kinda promiscuous AND he did have a crush on her in the past!!!! I feel really good with things with him and I right now, I don't want this to ruin it How do I move past this "stalking" thing? I know it's not healthy but now I feel completely in the dark. I feel so immature, I'm in my late 20's.

Thanks so much!

[?]

I know it's hard.. I been in that same situation.. I had to tell myself that if I was going to be with this guy I would have to trust him no matter what [until he gave me a reason not to].. I really don't think that the stalking on Instagram, etc is going to do any good... In my mind I would have to see it to believe it... I am 33 with a lot of experience with being jealous in a relationship...

[Danny]

For your own good let it go. If not just hack into her accounts or try to hang out with your bf more to prevent them from spending anytime together. Get a good girl friend of yours to become good friends with him so that when you are not around she can prevent them from hanging out alone.

[Heisenberg]

Stop being a crazy stalker and either trust him or don't. If you don't, then dump him and move on to a relationship that isn't defined by BS drama and female friend stalking.

For what it's worth, no, it's not at all suspicious that someone fixed their profile to stop crazy internet people from stalking them.

[Democritus]

Don't worry about it. Keeping an eye on your boyfriend who is hanging out with a promiscuous girl is COMPLETELY NORMAL. It's not weird or anything to be ashamed about. Most people would do it, even if they wouldn't admit it. You're protecting your heart, and that's a wise thing.

All you can do is set boundaries, and if you boyfriend ignores them then give him an ultimatum. It's either you or her.

[James]

put out.
A guy won't go for hamburger if he has steak at home.

[Delia]

Well its clear you don't trust him, I mean I understand how you feel. Ive gone through this and if he really cared for you and your relationship then he'd respect you and not continue the relationship he has with that girl(s). If your relationship meant something to him he'd stop talking to her. Period. And shes not a good friend if she continues to talk to him and get uncomfortably close to him, because that could mean something.

[Amwaj Qalbi]

Your story is a bit similar to mine so I know exactly how it feels. My husband had girls on his FB & IG and I would constantly stalk to see if anything suspicious or flirty was going on. I didn't have accounts either but used a family members. The simplest comment or even a like on a girls picture would boil my blood. But I think I'm just so over protective and afraid of seeing anything very serious and getting hurt. I was my husbands first true love (as he swears by) but i always have a gut feeling when it comes to girls. Could it just be that we're not sooooo confident and comfortable with ourselves? I always feel that way and blame it for my jealously and immature behavior. My husband never had prior relationships and I've never found anything BIG (hope you understand that) but I feel like I'm always searching for a problem to arise. I think we should just trust our men and as long as he loves you and respects you you should he fine. Good luck!