Relationship Advice!?

[Tyler]

This is somewhat lengthy and I apologize in advance, but I need some advice. I've been seeing this girl for a little over 2 months. She's amazing and I know her and I will have a great future ahead of us. However, there are some speed bumps currently on our path. When we first met, she was sleeping with some guy because she had feelings for him, but he just used her sexually. She told me that she stopped and and found out that he was playing many girls and moved on. Her and I then got really connected and I took things extremely slow because I was cautious. A month ago, I asked her if she was completely honest with me with everything. She then told me that she actually slept with the same guy once after she told me she had stopped. I said that it hurt my feelings but I appreciate her telling me the truth. About three weeks ago, I had this gut feeling that there was more to the story than what she shared. So I asked her and asked her and that turned into me going through her facebook messages(with her permission), where we discovered she was talking to a random guy from her college and the message was somewhat explicit. I asked her why she didn't tell me, to which she replied she wanted to know what the guy wanted. She has no feelings for him and she's not one that just takes off her pants for any guy. So she wanted to know what he was looking for and she also told me that her and I weren't exclusive at that point and apologized. She also noted that night she was drinking and was not happy and did that to build up her self-esteem. I told her that I thought we were exclusive at that point and was not upset at the incident, but rather that she was not able to trust me enough to tell me. Further, I told her I wanted to be that guy that when she's lonely she can call up and I want to be her everything. Since then, I took things slow and did a simple google search and found out that she has a match.com profile. I jokingly asked her if she had one and she rejected the idea for the past few weeks. I brought it up to her again this morning asking her to go through her emails to see if she has one or not. She didnt want to for multiple reasons, one being that she doesn't feel like I could trust her and two that she needed that privacy. I finally told her that I saw an email come through a few weeks ago from match.com and I don't understand why that would come through if she said she doesnt have one. Finally, she admitted that when I first brought it up she sent an email from her work email to the dating website asking them to delete it because she was not aware of it whatsoever. I asked her why couldn't she save all the time and tell me that from the beginning? She said she was afraid of my reaction and I told her, my reaction is worse when I know she's hiding something from me. I also explained to her that the issue isn't that she had a profile there or not, the issue is that she couldn't be honest to me about it. Through our talk today, I asked her that on my deathbed, does she have an account or any type of interaction with the website and she bluntly told me no she does not. I am not sure entirely what to make out of this situation, but I told her that i've done enough talking and am going to be meeting her after work at a mutual place where it's her time to talk.

A little bit more background, I've met her family, they love me. Since I'll be moving, she said she'll be looking at jobs near my work and is ready to live with me. It's pretty serious, but I am not sure what to say or do. My reaction when these things up aren't that I am extremely upset, but rather me listening and wanting to know more and the why to the question. I reallly like this girl (probably love her?) and from what I understand she really likes me. What do I say, what do I do? I think I will start off by saying, "it hurts me more than you can imagine when you hide things from me. I want to trust you, I want to believe every word you say and I do, but when things like this come up I don't know what to believe anymore and I am exhausted from prying information out of you." I am ready to try it again with her, but need reassurance that she won't do something of the nature again.

Oh she's 25 and I am 23. This sounds so high school like, i know.

[Aimee]

http://www.lovepanky.com/ This website will give you much advice to help you with your situation. I didn't read this all the way; it was too long. But I got the gist of your story =) Good luck with everything!

[Plumeria]

Learn to summarize.

[BeautyGirl]

She's lied to you a lot.
How can you trust her with anything? If someone truly cared for you, you wouldn't have to deal with all these problems. maybe she's not the one. You seem like a good guy, just be careful

[Mark]

I don't think moving in together is such a good idea. You are moving way too fast and she has a lot of issues she needs to get resolved first.

[john]

Bro, my advise is… if you're not in love with this girl, get out before you are and end up hurt. If she lied to you once, she could do it again without struggling. Unless she tells you that she absolutely promises that she won't lie to you ever again and you really trust her, give it another shot. If she's not sure that she can do that, then you pretty mucho know what's next. Good luck with that, man. I'm going through some girl trouble myself and it feels like hell. So best of luck to you, man.