advice for crazy sports fan?

[Dave]

okay so i am planning on running onto a soccer field during a professional game. The last 3 people who did that in soccer and 2 who did that in baseball as of 2010 have gotten tasered so i need a lightweight vest that will protect me from taser but allow me to still run and be agile. Do i need like a level IIA vest or can i go lighter? or do i even need balastic armour? thanks.

also im going to have my friend taser me a few times so i can get used to it incase i get hit in the arm or something.

thanks

[Michael B]

Go to the nearest psychiatric hospital and insert yourself.

[Jacob P]

Soak your body in water and run out there dripping wet. It will direct the current of the taser away from your body. Good luck!

[MBL loves Bacon]

1. This belongs in the soccer section.
2. ARE YOU AN IDIOT? Did you hear about the Phillies fan that ran onto the field? He got arrested. Trust me you shouldn't do this. Unless you want to be the butt of everyone's jokes and on TV. People will recognize you when they see you, they will make fun of you and lose respect for you. They will not, in any way , think youre cool or anything.

[Jennifer]

Yes you should do it so you can have a criminal record. Then when you try to get a job, you will have to explain why your such and idiot.

[Jon]

This is a joke, right ? As for your idea of having your friend taser you so you can get used to it is just dumb. Cops use powerful taser guns that shoot into your skin. Its not your everyday taser. Even so, a few times of being tased isn't going to stop you from being dropped to the ground when it happens at the game.

[Holly]

Well, technically, only 1 of the 2 baseball fans got Tased, so you have a 50/50 shot at escaping unscathed. However, I don't know how they do it in soccer, so maybe your chances are slimmer. Or maybe they'll just let the soccer players chase you down and kick you. So BE VERY CAREFUL.

As for armor, really, the best way to assure you will stay quick and agile would be to wear no clothes at all. Clothes really encumber your movement, you know. You're also a whole lot more likely to make the news if you run onto the field with no clothes.

That said, building up a resistance to Tasers is a great idea! Plus, all the electricity you're accustoming yourself to will make your hair stand up, which will look awesome. You might also get some really cool scars and look BAD. Like, I mean, BAD in a cool way. Maybe with 2 d's, like BADD.

Make sure you post to Twitter before you run onto the feild (and make sure you spell "field" like that) so we can all watch. I'll be rooting for you, buddy!! It's gonna be so ROXXORZ!!!