Should I apologize to my family? (No trolling please, serious answers only)?

[John Doe]

Before I say anything else, please don't bully me, I just want some advice. If you don't have a good answer then please leave my page.

Last week I had a fall out with my sister, she sent me a message and it hurt my feelings so I tried to overdose on pain killers and then her & our auntie were giving me crap about it even though she was the reason I did it in the first place.

I sent a message to the family on Facebook, 2 or 3 mutual friends were added to the list, I made a mistake and didn't realized, also I commented on my sister's depressed status and tried to cheer her up and boost her confidence, I clicked "like" on her friends' comments because I was pleased that people were caring for her besides her family and all I got was a text message saying:
"You been sending messages to my cousin, my friends and our cousin's partner, these are acquaintances, it's inappropriate, don't click like on my friends' comments, you don't know them. I know you think you're being supportive but you're just making everything worse. Me & your brother have other problems to deal with and we don't need to worry about you"

I don't see how I was in the wrong. Her message was rude, it hurt my feelings and made me feel small. Whether or not she's pregnant and feeling hormonal and shit, it doesn't give her the right to bite my head off over something so little. Even before she was pregnant, all she'd ever do is complain about how I am and how I do things. I'm not perfect but I try to be. I'm human like everyone else, I live to make mistakes, the best thing is to just try and learn from them, right?

Also, I have Asperger's Syndrome & Autistic Spectrum Disorder so my mind thinks differently from others. I take things to heart and don't think things through properly, she knows that and she should understand that but no, she just snaps at me like I'm some bloody 5 year old!!

For once in my life I'd like some respect too! My family always wonders why I'm so messed up, they should turn around and look at how they treat me! Sometimes I doubt they even love me because all they do is shout and complain at me, sometimes I hate them as well as love them.

1 of my cousin's spelled my name incorrect, she also said she "Questions my sanity" because I have depression and always post depressive Facebook status' yet, she and everyone else do. So much for love huh?

When I took an overdose, I took 6 Ibuprofen pills and my sister whined at me saying I pretended to kill myself. I didn't even knew it wasn't enough, isn't Ibuprofen stronger than Paracetamol? Isn't 6 tablets enough? After she said that, I just felt like taking more because it almost sounded like she was saying "That's not even enough".

Above all that, my aunt is STILL taking sides with my god damn drunken whore of a mother! When I was a child, she'd abuse me every day! After she divorced my father, we all found out he was abusive and got the family in serious debt as well as cheated on my mother. My mum blamed this on me for several years and would tell me she hates me because I am related to my father.
Since the age of 13, I had been self-harming and attempting suicide. When I was 14, she came in my bedroom, grabbed me by my shirt and shook me several times shouting "I hate you, I hate you" and she left marks on my neck. When I reached my late teens and early twenties, she had a drinking problem and she used to blame it on me and my step dad would believe her (eventually he found out the truth though and apologized to me which was good). When my step dad tried to leave her once, she threatened to bash his skull in with a metal door stopper, I feared for his safety and I don't even like him but I called the police which I believed was the right thing and my mother was being stupid saying I was in love with him even though he was like in his early 40s and couldn't stand him.

After my step dad left my mum, she told me that she hated me again and said if she had a choice, she'd go to the clinic so she'd have an abortion, half the time I wish she did!!

I confronted my family about them teaming up with her and for my sister always shouting at me all the time. Now they don't want anymore to do with me! They all think I'm crazy and need help.

I was gonna apologize to them for my actions but I don't think I should, I don't believe I was in the wrong. My sister should not have spoken to me like that. She could had just said "Could you please stop messaging so and so" and "Please don't click 'like' on my friends comments" without the attitude.

Does anyone else agree with me? Was I at all in the wrong? Does anyone else understand how I feel? Or am I just crazy and stuff?
@ Dogz

Thanks, I'm glad someone here agrees!
It just goes to show that even strangers get where I'm coming from!

I asked my best friend just over an hour or so ago, even he says they're being unreasonable!

So surprised you used "toxic of DNA" , lol, I used to feel like I was a disease to the family, now I feel that way about them.
@ Zaptrollwen

Sometimes I think Jeremy Kyle would get more sense out of them than I would, lol.

Apart from this, I always send them birthday & christmas cards, I even send them expensive gift vouchers sometimes on their birthdays if I have enough cash on me.
Not once did I received a thank you or even 1 lousy phone call just to ask how I am or how I've been, ya know?
It's not the thank you that bothers me, it's the lack of effort they show to even spend time with me.
I once bought flowers for my auntie as a birthday gift, chocolates for my lil cousin, a can of beer for my uncle and a doggy treat for their dog and I was planning to come see them, they all agreed to and at the last minute, they turned around and said "Sorry, we're going away on holiday now" .

Awful ain't it? Sometimes I wonder why I even bother half the time and they all called me selfish for committing suicide?!

[Dogz]

Do NOT apologize. If you have the means then I would make a clean break and sever all ties from this toxic stew of DNA. It should make you happier in the long run. I've not spoken to my family, I use the term loosely, in years and have been much happier.

[Zaptrollwen]

I really thought my life was bad until I read this. I have Autism (Aspergers) and Depression too. I'll try and help you as best as I can.

1. DON'T KILL YOURSELF!!! I've tried to commit suicide twice and, trust me, it gets you nowhere. Just because your life has been hard so far doesn't mean it'll still be that way in future.

2. I don't see why you have to apologise. If anything SHE should be apologising to YOU. She's the one with the problem. She's acknowledged that you're trying to help and make things better so now it's her turn to give back to you.

3. Some families are difficult. Your's seems to be too. Try spacing yoursel from them but don't cut yourself off completely. Give them time to contact you if they feel they want to. In the mean time surround yourself with some supportive friends (if there aren't many to hand feel free to contact me, i'm lonely as hell). and try and move on. I'd suggest also applying for the Jeremy Kyle Show but i'm not sure if that's taking things a step too far.

If you feel you need to talk it out some more you can message me on here. It's your choice. Also, remember to not let your family control your life.

I hope this helps!

[Unsure]

Your family are disrespectful and rude, you sound like a lovely boy, i wish you were my brother! Move on sweetie, don't let your disabilities stop you from living the life you live, go and make something of yourself and leave your family behind, it sounds sad I know, but you're family are horrendous and don't deserve someone as great as you in their lives anyway, they have too many issues and I feel so sorry you had to go on like that and live with all that hate in your life. If you think about it, there would be nothing to miss if you never spoke to them again because all they did was upset you and treat you like shit!

Don't you dare apologise to them! You were 100% right to stand up for yourself and you shouldn't regret it at all.

You're not crazy my love, you are in fact, the only sane one in your family by the sound of it!

Get some money together, get a job if you don't already have one, and find somewhere else to live far away from those awful people!

Hope this help, I wish you the best with starting fresh and living a new life! Enjoy being alive and enjoy living because you only get one life

Good luck! x

[Forgetme]

Hey John Doe ,
Your not the crazy one, and i can understand why you feel like apologizing even though its not your problem. It's not you has the problem from what i have read, it's your mum and your sister, unless they acknowledge what they have done, and remove their ego in order to change themselves, i am afraid not much can be done about them.

I guess your sister is quite young and stubborn, and i think you should try helping her indirectly through a second person like a counciller, without her knowing you did it. And if you have any really young children being abused in your house you shouldn't be afraid and report your mum to the police immediatly so they don't suffer later in life.

Coming back to you, i think its better you move out as your just going to feel unwanted, because of people mistreating you, and not giving you the respect you truly diserve. Trying to sort out your sisters problems even though she has abused you so much shows how much of an amazing person you are, and we need more nice people like you in this world . Secondly i think you need a counciller to talk out everything to, and to clear your mind and think of the future. Learn from your past, and use the present to improve your future, we only live once, so use your energy on whats really worth it, just because your born into a family, it doesn't mean they are the right ones from you. Stand up for yourself because your worth it

[awommack]

tell them