Me and my mom don't get along?

[Kayla]

So I'm 16 years old, female and me and mom do not get along. It's gotten to the point where I am so ready to just get far away from here and go to college. Ill be a senior next year so I have 1 year left till college. Anyways, my mom is crazy. She installed a tracking device on my phone and stalks me on every social networking device literally. Like she made a twitter account just so she could look at my stuff even though she doesn't post anything. It would seem like she doesn't trust me and at first when she started doing this it made me mad so I confronted her about it and my mom is one of those people who doesn't listen to anyone and only thinks her opinion is right so when I try to talk to her calmly I get in trouble for sharing my feelings. She said she does all this for her own piece of mind but that's bullshit. She tracks me and does all this that crap because she doesn't trust me and is just plain crazy. What makes me even more mad is that she has absolutely no reason to not trust me. I have never gone to a party or done drugs even though ive been asked to many times by many people. I've always said no because that's just not my scene. If anyone should be tracked and stalked it should be my friends cause they go to parties a lot and get drunk. Tonight I was going to hang out with friends but my mom got mad at me for some stupid reason(something to do with a dress?) and was like you can't go or do anything the rest of the weekend. I was going to have fun tonight and go to my first party(not to get drunk but just to hang out with friends) and I probably would only take a couple sips of alcohol but I can't now cause my mom is crazy. So me and my mom had a big fight today about how she's suffocating me and that if she doesn't stop, then I won't want to be here anymore and Ill end up rebelling. She also called me a slut which doesn't make sense because I've done nothing to be called that. I've been crying all day an had a terrible panic attack. What do I do??

[Cindy]

Your mom sounds like a lot like my mom used to be. She would not let me go to sleepovers or hang out after dark with my friends. It was horrible. Fortunately, she did not have access to all those tracking devices or she probably would have used them. I can understand why you can't wait to go to college.Have you tried talking to a school counselor or your doctor about the problems you are having with your mom? You don't mention your Dad so I'm guessing he's not in the picture. Do you have any siblings or are you an only child? Your mom sounds as though she is paranoid that something will happen to you if she doesn't watch your every move. What helped me was getting a job and staying away from home as much as possible. Financial independence. I started working when I was 16. I still didn't have much privacy but at least it got me out of the house and I was earning my own money. Your mom is like my mom as in she would not listen to anything I had to say so trying to reason with her was out of the question. Part of the reason she did not trust me away from home is because something terrible happened to her when she was young. Perhaps something happened to your mom as well. This might explain her behavior but it doesn't make it any easier to deal with the situation. I urge you to discuss this with a friend, face-to-face -- that way your mom can't use the phone to track what you say to your friend. It helps to be able to share your feelings with friends you trust.