Why do I still miss my ex and how can I stop :(?

[M]

I made so many memories with my ex, and risked so much to be with him. we met online when I was only 18, and he was 23. we're from different countries (England and the US.) I've spent thousands of dollars on visits to see him. I lost my virginity to him. but.. he lied to me so much. he deceived me, and lied about a drug addiction. he talked to girls behind my back, but became very jealous and accusatory regarding my friendships. he called me so many names and made me feel unworthy of his time and intellect towards the end of the relationship.. but I still miss him every day .

and I wonder if he's screwing someone else (he lost his virginity to me as well.) I worry about his drug use. I try to hate him, I really do. it's been so long now!!! four months on top of the last year of our relationship, which was hell.
but the first year was pure bliss. I've never felt so much passion.

I've deleted everything, I haven't looked at any of his social media profiles and similar things since we broke up, I talk to other men, I hang out with friends, I work, I have hobbies.
but I keep dreaming of him! I keep missing his smile! and wondering how the hell I'm ever going to meet someone that shares the same sense of humor as me again.

please, help me, how can I stop this?!

[Bharath]

Don't think about him or his company. You forget that he was there in ua life.

[Rose]

you are just hurting yourself! For your OWN sake! MOVE ON! just STOP thinking of him and make your self busy to other things. focus to yourself and love your self first. have self respect! ex is an ex!

[princess]

I know what you mean girl. I am on the same page. Exept that I didnt spend thousands of dollars on my ex. Instead I moved in with him and after two months he said he didnt want me anymore and kicked me out. Now that was painful. Havent talked to him since then and miss him like crazy. We just have to be strong. We cant force someone to be with us if they dont want to. but what I've learned is not to give my all because guys dont apreciate it. Always keep something for yourself dont make someone your whole world because if one day that person is gone you are not gonna have a place to stand on.

[Jay]

To find 'the One' in this life it is normal to have to sift through plenty of terrible relationships. What you did was wear your heart on your sleeve and he merely took advantage of that fact.

Did family tell you not to trust him? I would have from the start.

I'm English too and I have two sons (The oldest being 22) I would disown either of them if they treated a girl that way.

The fact you were able to delete everything is a good sign. It will help in the long run.

I would advise you to treat this not just as a poor experience, but as a learning curve. Think about EVERY mistake you made with him and learn from it. Make sure you never make the same mistakes again and you will get stronger.

The main thing for me (As a parent) would be to make sure you were close enough to me to be able to talk ( I mean REALLY talk) not just when something like this has happened but before.

One last thing. When people say keep your friends close but your enemies closer, they are wrong. I would keep my friends (& more importantly, family) very close but not let my enemies anywhere near me.