should i "out" my gay friend to everyone?

[868]

so i have this friend. we just met a week ago he knows im gay so were alone at my place and he tells me he's gay. i got so excited and i told him we have to tell everyone! and he got upset and told me not to tell anyone i felt so offended its like homosexuality is like a dirty secret to him and honestly it pissed me off.

there's nothing wrong with being gay i got pissed at him and declared that he's not truly gay if he wants to hide it and he got mad at me and left. now im frustrated by him i feel the need to broadcast his homosexuality all over facebook. i want to show people what its like to be gay and its hard to do that if we have individuals in the closet let alone the ones who aren't really gay if he was truly gay he would be happy about it

[Silence]

Want to be a good friend then mind your own business specially when that friend tells you to back off.
He will come out when he is ready. You trying to force him to come out when he isn't will probably make you lose his trust and friendship, which I am sure you wouldn't want to lose.

[BatgirlMolly]

Don't do it. It makes you look like the bad guy, and look stupid, and it's rude. Just like you have every right to be gay, he has a right to be gay and not tell anyone. It's his decision, and he might have reasons to keep it a secret right now, and that's okay. The best thing to do in your situation in my opinion is express your opinion to him, but let him handle it how he wants on his own. I can be happy about things I don't tell people about, and it doesn't make me any less happy, and it doesn't necessarily mean I'm ashamed, it just means I don't feel the need to broadcast it, and I wouldn't like it if someone shared something I told just them. Once it's out there, you can't take it back. It's your decision, but as a friend, you should follow your friends wishes for his own life, and as a homosexual, you should be proud of who you are and not feel the need to share what others aren't ready to talk about.

[LARA, age 82]

No

[Justin Freak]

You may not think that homosexuality is wrong, but there are many people out there who do think that it's wrong, and your gay friend is NOT ready to face all of that hate and discrimination yet.

You're happy about you being gay, but that doesn't mean that everyone else feels the same way. And hey, there was a gay guy named Tyler Clementi. You should read about him

Here:- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_of_Tyler_Clementi

Someone outed him as gay before he was ready, and he was so scared that he committed suicide. If you don't want to risk the same thing happening to your friend, then don't out him. Don't tell anyone that he is gay. And if you do want to risk it, and if he commits suicide, you will regret it. You will be thinking that it's your fault (and it really will be. No one can say that it's not your fault. Because he directly told you NOT to do it, but you did it). And people who support gay rights will be looking at you with faces like they're saying "hey...there's that jerk who outed that gay guy who committed suicide...". You may not realize it now, but after it happens, you will regret it. Because a human lost his life because of you.

AND, no one has to inform their sexuality to EVERYONE. It's a personal choice. If they want to, they can tell everyone, but there are some gay people who just tell a few people (AND THAT'S OKAY!).

If you out him as gay, it will be counted as "cyber bullying". Yes, you will be a bully.

And just because he is in the closet NOW, doesn't mean that he will be in the closet forever. He will come out to the people he wants to come out to. It's HIS choice, NOT yours. So, leave him be. Leave him and his sexuality alone.

[Kels]

Only knowing someone only a week is hardly a definition for the process of building a friendship, but in your case and you feel an attraction, and want to consider a friendship, wouldn't outing him be a betrayal? Certainly seems a way to lose what you may have built. If I was the friend and he isn't ready, if I was him, you'd be out of my life.

[reddy1975]

No if he is keeping it a secret there is most likely a good reason. You had no right to get offended without asking questions. Maybe he is Christian and would be put out of his family. Maybe it is for his job reason. Blurting it out behind his back will cause you more trouble than you want. Best think. before you make that move. slander is a tough case to beat when it is again you who needs to win

[Tony R]

Actually this goes for most secrets that someone tells you. If they say don't tell anyone, then you don't tell anyone. If it is something within reason. There is no pressing reason to tell anyone this. He is not going to shot people at the mall or rob a bank. This is not something that has to be out there.

I'm gay and if you did that to me, you would so be out of my life.

[The White Queen]

"Should i "out" my gay friend to everyone?"

That is something that you should never do, regardless of the situation. If he doesn't want anyone else to know then that's his business. Instead of taking his stance as a personal attack (which it isn't), see it as a compliment because you are the only one whom he's felt comfortable enough to share that information with. You should know the situation he is in, so you should also know that all he needs is support and that the rest is up to him.

"if he was truly gay he would be happy about it"

Being happy or unhappy about it has nothing to do with being "truly gay". It's basically like saying: "if she was a true blonde she would be happy being blonde" i.e. there is no sense behind that statement. Many LGBT folks who were and still are unhappy about who they are, sadly, for a multitude of possible reasons. Just because you're happy with it, doesn't mean others have to be.

[James]

It is NOT your place to tell anyone about his sexuality. No, of course homosexuality is nothing to be ashamed of but it sounds to me like you are one of the incredibly lucky ones who has come out and been accepted by his family and friends. You have no idea what his family and friends are like, you've known the guy a week. His parents finding out could literally destroy him if they aren't accepting, they may pull him out of school (I'm not sure how old he is), he may lose his job if there's no sexual discrimination protection there and maybe he'd lose it anyway if his boss was homophobic, there are a million dumb reasons you can make up for firing someone, and god forbid he end up doing something stupid if things got really bad thanks to his "friend" outing him...

You have no right whatsoever to out this guy and as a gay guy I'm honestly shocked and a little disgusted that you'd actually even think about it.