Why are women so defensive about their facebook use (please read the details of the question)?

[Ron]

One of my really close female friends is addicted to facebook. She had a really terrible last relationship with this guy, who even raped her. I talked to my friend everyday for a decent amount of time, and helped her recover. Then she had other superficial/flakey friends before, and being friends with them on getting notifications of their actions on facebook was giving her anxiety problems. I told her to cut them off, or keep things very limited with them. I also advised her to limit her fb use, so she wouldn't be anxious about what others thought of her. She unfollowed those friends, but didn't really limit her fb use.

On St. Pat's day, she had a party at her home. She had people over, and posted the event on her profile. I've been telling her to use the message/inbox option on fb, instead of writing things on her wall, because others can see it. On St Pat's day, a close friend of her ex texted her, and told her to meet him outside her apt building, he just wanted to say hi to her. She told him, ok, I'll meet you downstairs. This guy should have had no idea where my friend lived, because she never told him.

I told my friend after that incident that she needed to be out of reach of most people, she is very accessible to others. Unwanted people can reach her through fb profile, her phone number, even her home address. I told her she had to change her phone number, possibly her home address too. And limit her fb use. She got defensive with me, that she has not been using fb as much.

And today, she just used the "check-in" option on fb, telling everyone exactly where she is. When she takes a pic with someone, she always posts it to her profile for others to see. Why do women need the validation of others? Why are they addicted to fb, but get defensive about it?
Response:

She comes up to me herself, and asks me what she should do. I give her my opinion, but always tell her she should do what she believes in. Then she has some new issue that's bothering her, and it all stems from the fact that she can't handle her fb (addiction) habits.

[Under Siege]

Well, it's nice you want to protect her- but it's her life. The better option isn't locking herself away, people all handle trauma differently. This is her coping process; it won't be instant, you should stop nagging her and let her figure things out for herself.

[Matthew]

People, not just women, want attention. They post whatever is on their minds at the moment without giving any thought to what could happen when strangers read those posts.

She's getting defensive because no one wants to be told what to do. She had problems, so she's turning to Facebook to feel less lonely. It probably makes her feel better about herself when she sees all of her "friends" on her list.

Don't constantly harass her or she will cut you out of her life. If she does that, you won't be there if she needs you.

[Stella]

It sounds like your friend wants help, but doesn't know how to handle that help.

The next time she asks you what she should do, ask her if she will be willing to listen to your advice then do what you suggest.

You said she is addicted to Facebook and like any addiction, it's really hard to let go. Why don't you see what happens if you try to keep her busy outside of the house so she will see that she can live a day without posting?