Do I have some kind of mental illness?

[Harry]

In the last year(I'm 14 in the middle of year 9) my confidence around other people has completely gone. I used to love performing but now I can't even look people in the eye when I talk to them, I only choose to talk to my small group of friends. Its difficult to have conversations with anyone else without worrying. Its got to the point where I'm too worried to even post things on Facebook. I don't like seeing photos or videos of myself or even hearing voice recordings.

It's awful. And I'm quite a 'bright' person, but I'm not going to get anywhere in life with these confidence issues. What's wrong with me and how can this be resolved?

[Patrik]

If you were older I would first ask if you have been depressed over a longer period of time and if something major has happened in your life?

Being at the age you are it is probably some hormonal imbalances in you body that is effecting your mental state. You should not have to feel like that and I would contact a doctor and tell him/her how you feel. I don´t know if it is possible to check hormone levels in your body where you live though..

[Boys Town]

Hello,
It sounds like you are having a tough time so, I'm glad you are reaching out for support. Most times when we hear about poor self-esteem, we also hear about all the people who “gave” us our poor self-esteem. We need to break that thought process and start taking control immediately. The danger is that everyone starts comparing themselves to the people around them. But in the end what is important is that you learn to take control of how you see yourself and surround yourself with people who appreciate you!
People with negative self-esteem tend to be thinking about two things: the past • the future Thinking like this does one thing, it never lets you live your life. If your mind is stuck in either place, you never get to really experience what is good in your life right now. Here are some points to build your self-esteem:
- You are responsible for how you see yourself.
- Recognize that comparing yourself to others makes you feel less human. -Fill your life with things that work and things you are good at. -Surround yourself with people who appreciate what you are right now. - Focus on what you can control and recognize what you cannot control. - Refuse to see yourself just as an image. Most importantly, understand that having a great self-esteem says nothing about how good of a person you are. There are plenty of dangerous and hateful people who think the world of themselves. So every time you start to question yourself, remember that every day is another opportunity to be a good person and good people are a gift to the world. Since our self-esteem is basically how WE see ourselves, it is our responsibility to help it develop in a healthy way.
Take Care KO, Counselor