Im in love with my friend but she has a boyfriend... what can i do.?

[Matt]

ok so i've been friends with this girl for like 2 years now. we have a really good laugh whenever were together (normally in our group of friends) but one day i kind of realised i was constantly thinking about her, and by constantly i mean at least every 15-30 minutes... really bad i know!

We were walking back home from the pub one day (she lives around the corner from me so this is kinda normal) and we were having one of those sort of deep conversations about life and our futures (she graduated last year and I'm graduating in a few months) and all i could think about is how i wanted her to be a bigger part of my life and i couldn't bare the thought of not seeing her over the next year or however long it will be. We were getting to her flat and i was seriously considering asking her out on a proper date but i backed out at the last minute because i though it might complicate things too much as we are both moving to different cities this summer.

As soon as i got home i was already regretting not asking her and by the end of the next day it had go to the point where i hadn't slept for 24 hours because i couldn't stop thinking about it, so i wrote probably the longest text in history basically asking her out for a drink on her own in a date sense of the word rather than just as friends.

i got a reply in the morning and rather than just a straight yes/no kind of answer... she told me that she thought i was a great guy but she pretty much had a boyfriend and that she'd been seeing this bloke for a bit but it was a relatively new thing and wasn't common knowledge yet... i replied back saying that it was fine and apologising if it had made things awkward, basically putting a brave face on it, but it really knocked me back.

i basically stayed in bed all day not wanting to go out because i was an emotional wreck. Considering the fact that i didn't even cry at my Grandma's funeral last year, this was like an emotional breakdown by my standards!

i've had crushes on girls before but with her its different...i can't even explain the feelings i have for her but she is the first person i have really cared about and now i know that i can't even try and persuade her to let me take her out because she has a boyfriend already, it makes me feel sick to my stomach every time i think about her.

it's at the point now where i'm pretty sure i'm in love with her and their is absolutely nothing i can do about it and i can't describe how hard it is for me to try and stay friends with her when every time i see her Facebook or twitter pop up in my news feeds it feels like I'm being punched in the gut by mike tyson. thankfully she doesn't seem to have let it slip to our friends that i asked her out because I'm not sure i could handle all the questions over it.

Realistically i don't even stand a chance with her even if she broke up with her boyfriend because she is way out of my league (stunningly pretty, dark hair, gorgeous body and the kind of eyes you can just get lost in vs me the 6ft3, 20st and comparatively ugly bloke), and i wouldn't want to try and break them up anyway before anyone suggests that, because all i want is for her to be happy and if that means being with someone else then so be it but i just can't work out how to suppress my feelings for her. i've tried everything i can think of...

any suggestions either to ease the pain or to win her around if things go to pot with her boyfriend would be much appreciated.

thanks if you managed to get this far

[Fekefufu]

I've heard it all before "she is so special, no one else is like her, I've had crushed but this one is different" blah blah blah. SHe is a woman and you want her, that's nature, nothing more. But I'll be straight with you, she doesn't want you, she isn't interested and she probably doesnt even have a boyfriend. It's probably your insecurities that turn her off. You know, comparing yourself to other guys, putting yourself down, using a text to communicate instead of saying it while you're with them. All big turn offs for women. And what's this with easing the pain, "Ease the pain" what the hell? Stop being a drama queen. No wonder she is just letting you down in a nice way. Forget her mate, there are other women out there who will make you feel just as good as this one. One more suited you would be better