I have a new girlfriend but her ex sends her gifts and writes one liner 'miss you' posts on fb.What to do?

[Nick]

New girlfriend advice needed. The ex is persistent on being "friends" with her but keep on sending gifts, letters and writing emo love songs to her. And also posts 'miss you' one liners on fb and she responds..He agreed at one point to stop but it's resurged and it's a very uneasy feeling. I love her very much but would like some advice on how to deal with the situation.
Can anyone help me out?

[Sol]

o man what a douche. spread some nasty rumours about him , you could ask your gf to stop talking to him but you dont wanna seem to possessive

hmm yea spreading rumours is bad advice. to be honest, she is your gf, she wouldnt be with you if she didnt like you immensly. I think she may be testing you, to see how jealous you get. Either you show a lot of jealousy, on a one off basis, and make it clear you will not mention it again explaining you had to let her know how you felt. at that point hopefully she would stop her game and make you more secure.
alternatively you could show supreme confidence in your gf, and not act as if you think she would actually drop you for him. once she sees that confidence in you, you and her will see this ex boyfriends messages as nothing more than slightly pathetic.

[Nick]

Hi thanks for the reply. I don't have it in me to spread rumors about someone I don't know. I have told her in the past that it makes me feel uncomfortable. And I for sure do not want to come off as being overly possessive. I've also read some advice on here about giving the three chances of severing ties and from what I'm told she did so. But I can't help but to feel like I'm being either tested or played like a fool as a result of my patience dealing with the situation. He doesn't get the message, I get that. But does she clearly giving him the right message?


Hey Sol,
Really appreciate your time answering btw. It is a double edged sword situation. I even went as much as to empathize for the guy and that time will heal, cause I have been in the situation myself. And that keeping fb pics of him and her on her profile might 'lead' him on to thinking she still has feelings for him. So she took them off. Yet he kept them on and even went as far as to put them as his profile pic ? I know. Fb is not the end all be all but if I didn't notice these things I would have been kept in the dark about alot of things, let alone feel this way. I also think he's toying with her emotions and that I think is pathetic.