Guy friend + first time getting drunk?

[Excessiveterritory378]

HELP?! Guy friend of what?
Long story short this guy and I liked each other, went on a date, but then he said he didn't want to ruin our friendship & he didn't like me that way... Things went on normally. I saw him everyday because of the sport we did & nothing seemed different. I'll admit I was kinda sad about it but I didn't sulk about it for months. He's honestly a really good guy. Does well in school, isn't a player, and has good parents. However, whenever I post a picture with a guy he always gets super nosy and asks questions like if I like him, what his name is so he can stalk his fb, and what he looks like. Why would he go through all of this if he just wanted to be friends? he said he just wants to know because he was wondering but I call that BS. He refers to our thing as past tense like "well we used to have a thing so.." We talked for 3 hours the other night when he saw my pic for prom... This conversation lead to talking about the after party. He said he recommended getting drunk which I quickly declined. His response "well, come down and visit me and I'll get a DD and we can drink together." I said I'd think about it. He's leaving for college in August too, so that's why he wants me to come see him. Our thing happened when I was a sophomore and he was a junior. So it's been a couple years since our "date." Does he like me now or is he just looking for a good time? I really need some advice. I still have a little crush on him, but I don't know what's going on.

[RIcky]

brutal honesty: it sounds like he likes you as a person and thinks you're attractive so he wants to hook up with you - but not date you. it doesn't mean he's a bad guy and it's not a reflection on you it's just where he is in his life right now. if he wanted to date you he'd be inviting you out on real dates with specific times attached not saying more or less "why don't you come out drinking with me sometime between now and august". if you're only interested in a relationship then this is probably not a good plan. if you're okay with being his semi-platonic drinking buddy or a hookup (imo there's nothing wrong with either, for the record) then it's fine.

i'd recommend drinking for the first time with some friends you know you can trust 100%.

it's possible i'm interpreting the situation wrong but there's my two cents.

also if you haven't actually been alone with this guy before, be careful. good grades, non-player and good parents only count for so much. chances are you'll be drunk and sleeping over at his house (?) if this occurs. is this someone you're pretty sure you can trust in that situation?

that said, i'm not saying "don't do it", either. just consider this stuff before you decide one way or another. you're an adult now you can do what you want

be safe; have fun!

good luck!

[Daniella]

i more or less agree with ricky but would add there's a chance the guy actually IS interested in dating you he's just too nervous to make a big deal of asking you on a real date so a "drinking date" is easier. (because from his perspective you might not like him and if that's so then a quasi-platonic date like this is easier for him so as not to lose face because if it doesn't work out then he can just pretend like it was never a date in the first place).

if he does want to date you i agree with ricky that genuinely asking you out on a real date (specific time/date and not just "let's drink together") would be the proper way to do it and would show excellent character, however people aren't perfect and sometimes even for good guys stuff like this is just how it works out despite their best intentions.

that said, i agree be careful just on principle, especially if this is your first time drinking. you're a young lady now and regardless if you go on this date/outing or not, it's probably worth investing in a pepper spray or a personal alarm to carry in your purse if you haven't yet -- not because i think this event sounds particularly shady but just because it's a good thing to carry with you.

i also agree this guy is definitely attracted to you, the fact that he's questioning you about guys on your facebook page and chatting to you for three HOURS online speaks volumes

best of luck<3