my best friend( or used to be) think i'm fake!!!!help!!!!?

[682]

so i have this friend,a boy, i think he's mature and we've been bffs since 2 years ago, we usually have a lot of fights recently and i can really feel we are drifting apart.
About several weeks ago, we were chatting (on facebook, i have a clone nick that i only use to chat with him and my other bff, it's kinda a secret) and he said his mom and dad weren't married until his mom was pregnant him and i said ''slut alert''. now i only think of ot as a casual joke but he seems to take it too serious . at the end i really thought he put that away
But the day after that, he didn't even speak to me again so i think it's because he got something on his mind and i just go along with it. Several weeks past and he still wouldn't talk to me, then i was rly confused how he still talk to people but not me , however i just go with it, then he got all weird and strange one afternoon and then he talked to me, for the first time in weeks and i don't know ,i just rolled my eyes and thought'' is he serious? like im somekind of toy that he can throw away and then reuse whenever he wants ?''( at that point i was rly tired with all his shit )
that afternoon i went on fb and there he was, tagging me to a status saying ''this is (insert my name) nick (insert my nick) everyone (insert a lot of ppl's nick)''. when i asked him why he did it, he said it's about his mother thing and that im a fake friend
he even wrote a status about it. i'm rly confused now bc i'm easily affected by ppl. HELP!!!!!!!

[Leslie Mc.]

He's mad about his mom, apologize tell him it was a mistake and that you were only joking say you didnt apologize cuz you didn't know how to, stay that he is your best friend and times have been hard since you stopped talking, tell him you miss and need him, do big gestures for example, the boy opens the car door for the girl, you should tag him too stuff like a best friends photo and stuff like that almost like he was your boyfriend.

[124]

Here's the thing about joking to the degree to where you use very cruel terms like slut, whore, or even racist remarks. When you joke like that, you're really risking a relationship with that person. Even if you did not mean to call his mother a slut, that word still registered to his mother in his head. There are just some things you just don't say or joke about. Plus he probably did not tell you the whole story about the time she was pregnant. Maybe she had a REALLY difficult time, maybe she was mean to him as a child due to stress, maybe he found out he was almost aborted, which could really be painful to know. I mean you just don't know, and then on top of that you, you say 'slut alert'. Again, I know you did not mean it, but not everyone (not even your closets friends) react in the way that you hoped they would. Certain jokes mean certain things to certain people. That was probably the reason why he wasn't speaking to you. But my question is, why didn't you apologize?

About the Facebook status thing, I agree that that was not the way get back at you. If he knew your clone profile was very private to you, he should have respected that. I think at this point, he's looking to hurt you more than he is being respectful to you. If any time a person has a problem with their friends, it does not take rocket science to know that you should communicate and talk this out immediately. he hasn't done that.

I have two possible options here for you.

1) Leave it alone. If you be the bigger person and just be silent about it, hopefully, that will end this little tug of war. And he might feel guilty because he's expecting a reaction out of you, but if you don't show it, you might surprise him.

2) You can respond to him and say something like
"I'm very sorry if I offended you. I don't know your mother and would never dream of hurting you or her. But it was a joke. We joke all the time and I assumed you wouldn't take it seriously. But I understand if jokes can go too far. However, what you did by exposing my profile that you knew was very private to me was totally not the way to resolve a problem you had with me. Why couldn't you talk to me about what was on your mind? I can't guess how you feel. Considering how things have been between us, maybe it's for the best if we just part ways if we can't get along. After all, we do always fight, and that's not good in any relationship."

Try this.

[LadyXSakura]

To be honest, I would be angry if someone would call my mom a "slut". That's something you never do. It's just not respectful even as a joke. Try to put yourself in his shoes and get your mom to be called like that. If I was him, I would just stop being friends with you and go on with my life. I guess everyone deals with situation differently. When I read your post, it seems that you didn't even try to apologize. You were very passive about it while you said something hurtful to him.

There's nothing to be confused about. You said something that upset him and you did nothing to mend the situation. Now he trying to get it back at you. How about you meet him next time and have a talk with him? Maybe you should apologize for the joke you made. See how it goes from there. If he forgives you, then you will remain friends. If not, then just move on from there and find yourself new friends. Let it be a lesson for yourself and be more respectful to people you treasure.

[blogRot]

You fucked up when you called his mother a slut - bad, bad move. You should be grateful that he's even talking to you again.