What would be the best way to handle this situation?

[lisa godfrey]

My good friend is seeing a married man casually. She really likes him but tries to keep it casual and friendly, while she wants him very much, he seems very distant. He told me he likes me when him, his brother my friend and I were all hanging out. I completely ignored his statement by brushing it off with a smile, I knew this man was flirting but I pretended he meant as a friend like "I like you". He sent me a message on Facebook and he is not a Facebook friend of mine, he found me through my friend's Facebook. He greeted me politely and respectful and afterwards repeated "I like you, lets hang out sometime be my party buddy". I told him "Sure, just give my friend the info and we can all hook up again as a group, let your brother know!" He clarified he wants to hang with ME and that it doesn't have to only be when Nicole is around, it can be just us, that he has a lot of female friends and that he doesn't see the issue in just us going to a party. He calls, text me and its always the same thing "let me know if you want to hang out and go party, your cool your friend is too quiet I wish I had met you instead of her" THE THING IS THIS GUY IS VERY SOCIABLE AND IS DECENT, PEOPLE WHO KNOW HIM RESPECTS HIM, HE IS NICE TO MY FRIEND AND TO ME AND NOW THIS NEW SITUATION WITH HIM IS A LITTLE WIERD TO ME. WHAT SHOULD I DO? P.S. I tried explaining to the guy that it feels weird to me to ever even consider hanging out with him without my friend around and he replied "your friend is not my girlfriend, I am married yes but I'm separated, I have a lot of female friends I'm just inviting you out with me because I think your cool I just want to be friend, I've met you more than once and I think we can be friends right?" I told him we can be friends sure but I prefer to hang out with you only if its in the company of my friend. He agreed but yet he reply "yes that's fine but if you ever just want to go to a party or anything, you can hit me up, I'm actually going to a party this weekend so if you want to go out just let me know.SO AM I TRIPPING OFF NOTHING? WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION TO MAKE IN THIS PREDICAMENT?

[Ricardo]

If you want sex with him then take him up on his offer. Otherwise just say no thanks.

[BeatriceBatten]

Don't be friends with a man who's cheating on both his wife AND his mistress. Because he'll do the exact same thing to you.

Have some self-respect and do not interact with him. At all. Not even as "friends," because that's clearly not what he wants.

[Ashley M]

Until he can show you divorce papers, you don't do a damn thing. Even then I still wouldn't do anything because he's a married man and already messing around on your friend by trying to get to you

[MM]

Tell him no. You are not interested in cultivating a closer friendship, and you do not want to socialize with him unless it is in the company of your friend. You also do not understand why he says he wishes he had met you before Nicole, because you are not interested in him the way Nicole is - and if that's what he's getting at with these invitations, he needs to back off before you let both Nicole and his wife know what he's been saying. If his intentions are genuinely innocent, or he has any sense, he'll let it go. But I think you know perfectly well they're not, and he needs to know his little game's not going to work on you.

[Rosalie]

Well, first of all, you should consider posting under something that is not your real name, if that is- because people can find you on the internet. It's not safe. In addition, don't give your friend's name either.

As for the rest of the mess, block this guy on your phone, your FB, everything, and put some distance between you. He is a cheater, and even if he is by some miracle separated, he isn't what you want to be near. Cheater, cheater, cheater, and he clearly has no concept of what it is to be good and true to anyone. You don't need to be involved with that.

If you happen to see him in town again and he asks, tell him you don't involved yourself with married men. DOn't let him explain, just tell him you're not the least bit interested, and walk away. If he keeps coming back, report him to the police.

As for your friend, there is no such thing as "casually" seeing a married man. You're either seeing a married man or you're not. It's up to her as to whether she does this, has any standards, owns a brain - but if you are a friend, tell her there is nothing promising in it, because if he is doing all of this to his current wife - which he does still have- he WILL do it to the rest of the women he charms. *YECH*

[almarj70]

Ahh yes, a "separated" married man who is looking for another female "party buddy" . Let us know when he tries the old " my wife doesn't understand me " line on you. I would bet my house on the fact that you are just the latest in a long line of chumps. If you have an ounce of pride and self respect you will run away as fast as you can.

[nanners]

Tell him you are not interested in being his "party" friend. And isn't this your good friend's friend you would be partying with? Tell him thanks but no thanks and quit trying to arrange something because the answer is always going to be no. Sometimes guys just don't get it and you have to be downright rude to get the answer across.

[Poodie]

Oh, F.F.S. Why can't you just say, "No"? Why does he have your phone number anyway? You are making this way more complicated than it needs to be.

Him: "Let's hang out without Nicole sometime"

You: "No, I don't think so. Thanks for the offer though."

Him: "Why not?"

You: "I''m not interested. I also don't think we should text anymore. Please delete my number."

Him: "Why?"

You: " "

Block his number, and do not take his calls. If you don't, you are going to hitch yourself to a runaway train that your friend is already conductor of, and it's going to crash.

[Liz]

You should tell him that just because your friend is cheap and easy doesn't mean you are the same.