I'm secretly a jealous girlfriend and I don't want to be?

[Caitlyn]

My boyfriends best friend is a girl. They call and text alot, I've met her once and she's insanely pretty which really annoys me because I can't compete with that. My boyfriend also told me he looks at his ex profiles to see what they're saying and if they're writing stuff about him. I know that one isn't too bad because ive done that too. But not while weve been together but it's his best friend who I have a problem with. What can I do

[Grant]

Underneath it all EVERYONE is a jealous bf/gf in reality but it all comes too how much you trust him, if he does like his best friend then why did he choose to go out with you instead of her and as for the ex profiles thing I think a lot of people do that and I wouldn't worry about it too much.

[in U i FOUND me]

grow up!

[J.U.]

I think your reaction is completely normal, especially because it sounds like your boyfriend and this girl have a very close friendship and maybe even knew each other before he knew you. It's natural for you to feel a little bit intimidated or threatened, because your boyfriend's best friend is not only a girl but a pretty one, so don't consider yourself abnormal.
You asked what you should do, but I'll tell you what I don't think you should do, which is appear to be the jealous type - even if you are a little envious! Men truly despise jealous women because they (men) are relatively simple creatures: they don't like the complicated, vicious, catty games that women play and all the malicious things deeds they commit when they are consumed by jealousy. They like women who trust them, not women who won't allow them to associate with members of the opposite sex because you're distrustful and envious. (I'm not saying that this is the type of woman you are; I'm just explaining what they don't like.)

Also, don't feel that you need to compete with your boyfriend's best friend. There is a reason that they are just friends and you are his GIRLfriend, and that reason is, he loves you in a very special way, a way in which he does not like his friend. If this girl begins to threaten your relationship by exhibiting behavior that is inappropriate for someone who is supposed to be just a friend, then, if I were you, I would express my concern to my boyfriend - but at the right moment. If you do this too quickly, your boyfriend may end up resenting you because he will think that you do not trust him.

As for his tendency to look at his ex-girlfriends' walls, it would not be a good idea to badger him about this, or bring it up at all because probably the way he sees it, it's his Facebook account and he can do whatever he wants. On the other hand, I understand your concern, so if you want, maybe you can gently, tactfully, carefully ask him why he does. Ask him why it matters what others say about him. Is there a part of him that hasn't completely let go of those girls? After all, what matters is what you think of him since you are his girlfriend.

Anyway, this is getting long.

Good luck!

(By the way, have you seen My Best Friend's Wedding?)