Should I forgive her for cheating?

[341]

So my gf went on a trip to her brothers place in a different country for 2 weeks. The problem was, that her brother was living with another guy. Because of that, there wasn't any available spot to sleep except on the same bed with that guy.
I was realy frustrated about all this, but at the first day she convinced me, that she loves me and nothing will happen, ever. That she has no appeal to him ect.. My intuition was telling me that something will go wrong, and of course.. It did. At the very last night, before coming back to her home country, she got realy drunk with the dude + smoked some weed. Well she was wasted hands down, and at the end of the night, she had sex with him.. She explained to me, that it ment nothing to her, that she couldn't control her thoughts because she was really wasted, and one of the reasons she did it was, that this dude was pressuring her to do it for the whole 2 weeks and that I wasn't there for her( I wasn't near her to remind her about us). Oh, and I found about this myself from hacking her FB account, where she was chatting, sending letters to the dude about how they should meet sometime, when he comes to her home country ect.. She said, that she was just using him, that she didn't mean anything she said to him.

She cried, begged me for giving her another chance on the phone for 6 hours during the night. She said that it won't happen ever again, and that she knows my trust is lot for her, but she hopes she will regain it during the time
She said, that she loves me, and I mean the world to her, and that she is scared to live without me.. After all that I sort of said - "ok, we will see", which ment I gave her a small chance, but I'm not sure, if that was the right thing or not..
Oh, and she said that she will stop all contact with that dude, and everyone else that I see suspicious of threatening out relationship.

[bill g]

once a cheat , always a cheat , you need to consider your future --- good luck

[Jason]

you know the answer

one thing for sure

if you dont want to trust her, dont

you cant make someone earn your trust .. its something you give freely

not prepared to do that

move on

[?]

If she cheated on your once why wouldn't she do it again? You need time to think about this. It could have been a mistake but you won't be able to trust her again not like before

[Gaurav]

Luv says forgive me.....
Ego says leave her.....
Just help her she is your love......
people do mistake but that was her first mistake....go help her......call her.....she is yours....

[David]

Some good answers here. That really sucks man. You deserve better than that. This is going to be very difficult to get over, it it is able to be gotten over. If this happened to me, I would move on with my head held high. Good luck man.

[Glenn]

Sometime if someone's cheated once, it can be forgiven especially if they're wasted, but the fact thatshe was also consciously messaging this guy shows that she had probably decided to do it, I'm sorry mate but I think u should leave her

[Chris Hill]

Dump her , first of all shes saying you weren't there for her to remind her of you and her , that's manipulation . what she did was wrong regardless of being under the influence and she used you as an excuse for it! Its not even like she had the decency to come to you and tell you , you had to find out on your own . I had a similar situation with an ex of mine we broke up and I ended up sleeping with another girl even tho I truly loved my ex , well what happened was we got back together days later but I told her about what I did before BC its decency . you finding out on your own is a major red flag . I'd say give her another chance if she came to you immediately and told you everything from the get she is most likely genuinely sorry butt she didn't. And the msgs on Fb another red flag , she said she was using him , well for what ? Dick ? She shouldn't need any man besides you .

[Heather]

If she could resist him for the first two weeks of being there why give in on the last night?? I'm sure that wasn't the only night they got drunk why would she sleep in the bed with him after knowing he wanted her? There is a floor where she could have made a pallet. It must not have bothered her. You found out on your own she never would have said anything doesn't that make you wonder what else she's hiding? I wouldn't even waist my time anymore if I was you

[Ilas]

She didn't sleep with her brother because she knows it's wrong to sleep with another guy in one bed, there will still be a potential risk of having sex. Plus she knows that the guy was begging her to have sex and she still sleeps between his arms. Believe me there is much more to the story than that, and what kind of brother is fine with his sister sleeping with his roommate.